It’s OK, peo­ple mat­ter much more than things

The Daily Telegraph (Sydney) - Best Weekend - - FRONT PAGE -

Hurt­ing chil­dren is rarely a help­ful way to teach them. Our chil­dren learn lessons best when we take time to teach them.

Per­haps Chad might point out what hap­pened and ask his son how the neigh­bour would feel with a ru­ined com­puter. He could teach em­pa­thy.

He could also in­vite his son to de­scribe more ap­pro­pri­ate items to use as skate­boards in the house.

If our child broke some­thing or dis­re­spected prop­erty, our re­sponse will be most ef­fec­tive when we: see the is­sue as a chance to con­nect; un­der­stand rather than rep­ri­mand; en­cour­age our child to con­sider how their choices have af­fected oth­ers and in­vite our child to iden­tify ways to make things right (which should be based on their abil­ity to make resti­tu­tion).

How of­ten do we, as par­ents, be­come an­gry at the cup of spilt drink, the bro­ken toy, the Tex­tra scrawled along the wall, car­pet, or lounge suite, or even some of the more costly things our chil­dren ruin?

For­tu­nately Chad was gen­tle with his son. When he ex­plained the prob­lem to the lit­tle boy, he could see he felt both ter­ri­ble and re­morse­ful.

Then Chad and his lit­tle boy came clean to their neigh­bour. Af­ter ex­plain­ing what had hap­pened he was sur­prised to hear his neigh­bour re­spond: “Chad, it’s OK. Peo­ple mat­ter more than things.”

What a great les­son from a wise neigh­bour. He added: “I hope you didn’t get mad at your son. He’s just three.

“He didn’t know how se­ri­ous what he was do­ing was.”

Newspapers in English

Newspapers from Australia

© PressReader. All rights reserved.