Lights, cameras, action ... It’s time to shine

CAN you believe it all happens tomorrow? The international coverage, the exposure of our treasured assets, the sheer breadth of talent that will be on display.

Oh, and apparently it’s the opening of the Commonwealth Games too.

Let me be clear, while I’m all about supporting both our city and our athletes in these days of sporting glory, I’m even more about the associated opportunity to shove my kids into the spotlight for a few hours of sort-of stardom tomorrow morning.

The BBC is in town to film every aspect of this festival of fun and Games, and one small part is their children’s news programme Newsround.

Well, they say it’s one small part … I say let’s just see what happens when they call “action”.

Through convoluted means, a producer of the show contacted me a few weeks ago to see if I knew of any children who might be appropriate to host this behind-the-news style show.

In their words: “As many of the kids here in the UK will be unfamiliar with the Gold Coast as a place, we’d like to do a ‘welcome to the Gold Coast’ short film, which ideally will be fronted by two kids who live in the area.

“The plan would be to visit some of the local landmarks, including some of the ones associated with the Commonwealth Games. We’re ideally looking for two confident and bubbly kids over the age of 10.”

Obviously I thought long and hard about which children might be appropriate for this role for at least a good two seconds … and then realised I just happen to have a couple of kids I prepared earlier.

I simply assumed that by ‘confident and bubbly’ they meant ‘facetious and hyper’ and by ‘over the age of 10’ they meant 10 and 8.

The fact that my son thinks the event is called ‘The Common Games’ just adds to the charm, right?

Regardless, tomorrow morning the children and I will climb to the scenic heights of Miami Hill, journey to the top of Q1, feed the technicolour rainbow lorikeets at Currumbin Sanctuary, romp in our wonderful ocean waves and visit the sacred bowels of Carrara Stadium.

All right, so technically I won’t be in shot. But I’ve been practising my photo bombs and I dare that camera not to love me.

I mean, I know this show is about the children, not me, but it can’t hurt to get my hair done just in case, right? It’s a kids’ show after all and every kid has a mother. Plus, I’m way funnier than those two. I taught them everything they know. #fartjokesrule

But of course we all know the real star. The gorgeous Gold Coast.

This lady don’t need her hair done. She was born ready.

While I am super excited for the kids to have their chance to shine on camera (let’s be real: they ain’t never gonna be standing on a sporting podium), I’m honestly more pumped to see my city take centre stage.

I grew up in America at a time when Australia was considered to be as inhabited as Antarctica. Then Crocodile Dundee came along and at least people knew about the Outback and Sydney, although they still asked if I’d ride a kangaroo to school when I moved here. (It’s OK. I got my revenge telling them Vegemite was Australian fudge.)

But the Gold Coast to this day draws blank looks. Where? From the UK to the US, we’re just not on the map.

It’s incomprehensible. We have to be one of the most photogenic – and fun – cities in the world. Look, Waikiki is lovely, Miami has the nightlife and LA is a hole. But the Gold Coast has it all – beautiful beaches, amazing nightlife … and Southport.

Unfortunately, Americans still aren’t going to be witness to our awesomeness, but my kids are ready to show the Poms just what they’re missing. Besides, I’m pretty sure if someone told Trump the US is actually part of the Commonwealth he’d believe it – and broadcast it.

And who wouldn’t want to be part of this? It’s such an exciting time for our city and we are so proud to be involved.

World, we are ready for our close up.

BUT OF COURSE WE ALL KNOW THE REAL STAR – THE GORGEOUS GOLD COAST