What sort of parent uses a leash? Me, that’s who
After having our second child, my husband and I have become ‘those parents.’ Parents, who pre-kids, I never thought we’d be. Parents who walk their child on a leash.
Ooooh, I hear you say. Surely nobody would admit so publicly to such a controversial means of toddler transportation? Well I’m here to take the lead on this contentious issue (pun very much intended).
To defend the exasperated mums and dads who are judged, smirked at and heckled, simply for tethering themselves to their child instead of strapping them into a stroller.
If you spend much time on social media, you likely came across the photos of a father in the US taking his five-year-old quintuplets (yes five kids) for a walk on leads. The only thing that shocked me about that picture was how much flack he copped for posting it.
It ignited a huge debate – he was either an incompetent father treating his kids like dogs, or an absolute legend doing his best in a very tough gig.
The kids looked happy, and they were all accounted for. I’d say that’s a good day in the office for a father of quintuplets.
Now, I don’t have five kids. But I do have the busiest 20 month-old on the planet, who runs instead of walks, and laughs instead of listens. So I completely understand the need for a lead.
The idea first came about when I was pregnant with Pia. I would ask friends how I’d get around with a baby and a pram-hating toddler. A few would jokingly say, ‘You need to get one of those leashes …’ and we’d laugh. Because, you know, as if any self-respecting parent in 2022 would actually do that. Leashes are for dogs, right? Wrong. Allow me to plead my case. Consider this your guide on how to leave the house with two under two, and make it safely back with two kids still in tow.
Firstly, I found the modern day kid leads are much more subtle than what you’d imagine. We opted for a toddler-sized backpack with a harness, and it’s actually adorable. Because the lead attaches to the back of the bag, it’s evenly weighted, and the bag itself is also quite handy for carrying snacks. So it’s practical, and aesthetically, quite acceptable. My son Bobby also approves. His eyes light up when he sees it, excited to run the streets (almost) freerange.
That’s one of the biggest reasons I’m now pro-lead. The walk itself becomes a fun sensory adventure, where Bobby can run, walk, stop, start, pick flowers, touch fences, even hold our dog’s lead. Like a mini lead conga line. It’s quite hilarious, and much more enjoyable than pushing him in a pram, feeding him snacks to delay a tantrum.
I also find with toddlers, the more freedom you give, the less they demand it. Towards the end of our journey, I find Bobby is happy to walk alongside me, even hold my hand.
If I haven’t won you over yet, standby for my closing argument.
Our strolls around the neighbourhood are just before dinner time, and this is why – by the time we’re back home, my little energiser bunny is just about out of juice. It’s one of the best ways to burn that crazy afternoon energy, and it also builds a big appetite. He will usually scoff down dinner and wind down for bed with little fuss. Usually.
But I rest my case.
I don’t want to mislead you, we have a very elaborate trike with all the necessary bells and whistles as the preferred vehicle to transport the toddler. That’s for big morning walks, so we can actually cover some kilometres, and without any judgment.
But the lead has its place in our daily routine and while I hope I won’t be using it when Bobby is 5, we will carry on until I know for sure he won’t run straight for the road the second I turn my back.
I’ve since had plenty of inquiries from other mums too, who want to join us, some already have. Strength in numbers!
At the end of the (very long) day, we all need to judge less and support each other. Being a parent is not a walk in the park … however, as I’ve found, it can be a much more manageable and enjoyable walk if it’s with a lead.
A few would jokingly say, ‘You need to get one of those leashes …’ and we’d laugh. Because, you know, as if any selfrespecting parent in 2022 would actually do that. Leashes are for dogs, right? Wrong.