Thoroughly modern pair truly in love
THERE is an oft-repeated notion that divorce is terrible for the emotional development of children, and that coming from a “broken home” makes them, as adults, less likely to find stability in their own relationships.
Harry Wales and Meghan Markle — now Duke and Duchess of Sussex, among their other titles — prove there is more to the story of the post-divorce generation.
The excruciatingly public dysfunction of both Harry and Meghan’s families does not appear to have made them damaged or unfeeling adults.
Instead, this new husband and wife appear grounded, committed, serious people embarking upon a life they hope can be dedicated to the causes they care most about, including mental health, veterans and women’s rights. They started as they mean to go on, by asking the 600 guests at their wedding to donate to charity instead of giving gifts.
And, most importantly of all, they seem genuinely and deeply in love.
The romance of Meghan and Harry tells us something more complex than the cliche about divorce being a universally terrible thing. Maybe both their lives were improved by not having to live under one roof with parents whose love had fizzled out.
In Meghan’s case, her mother, as a single woman found a new purpose becoming a social worker, yoga teacher and activist.
Harry’s family breakdown was overshadowed by the shocking death of his mother when he was just 12 years old — but he seems to have built a warm and loving relationship with both his father and the Windsor family as well as his mother’s Spencer clan: her sisters Sarah and Jane, and her brother Charles, Earl Spencer. Indeed, Harry and Meghan chose Prince Charles to give away the bride, and aunt Lady Jane Fellowes to give the reading.
Meghan’s mother Doria Ragland accompanied her to the chapel, and her father was to be included until some unfortunate and complicated self-inflicted embarrassments saw him decline to attend. (In case you haven’t been following, paparazzi photographers and open-heart surgery were features.)
Both Meghan and Harry have taken a long road to love. She was married once before; he has had two long-term relationships as well as a dozen lesser entanglements.
She is 36. He is 33. Unlike their parents, they are coming into this marriage as adults, both established in their lives and experienced in the complexities of life and love. In other words, they’re typical of a generation that marries later and has children later.
For so long, Western societies such as Britain and Australia put enormous pressure on couples to marry young and stay together, happy or not.
Now, couples like Meghan and Harry can get together in their own time and stay together because they want to.
Unlike his brother, father and grandfather, Harry is choosing to wear a wedding ring. He’s a modern man, entering a modern marriage.
We wish Harry and Meghan, most heartily, a long and happy life.