It’s a trial for all concerned
IF YOU haven’t read Franz Kafka’s horrific vision of bureaucracy holding an empire on the interminable brink of utter collapse, don’t bother.
The Trial is a meticulous and depressing masterpiece by the gloomiest literary neurotic of the last century – a thoroughly unenjoyable but prophetic read about the creeping cancer of administrative bumbledom.
A similar effect can be achieved by thrusting splintery toothpicks beneath one’s fingernails and sitting through a senate inquiry into – and it’s a mouthful – the Governance and Operation of the Northern Australia Infrastructure Facility.
The GONAIF probe, whose cheery acronym was at odds with the actual tone, slid snugly up and into Cairns this week.
Its committee consisted of a secretary and four senators – Murray Watts and Chris Ketter from Labor, Andrew Bartlett for the Greens and the Coalition’s lone defender of all things Coalition, Barry O’Sullivan.
It was a predictable affair from start to finish, with a run-sheet of witnesses called to bash the $5 billion infrastructure loan facility for killing the environment, being secretive, and taking donkey’s years to spend a cent on anything other than managerial costs.
The irascible Senator O’Sullivan was offended by the whole ordeal, which he dubbed a “witch hunt” and “absolute tripe”, and set about reducing most witnesses to pulp.
He dismissed their evidence as “Google research” balderdash, since they admitted they had not studied every piece of legislation, regulation, convention, mandates and guidelines that dictated how NAIF functioned.
His list included, but was not limited to – brace yourself again – the Public Service and Performance Accountability Act, guidelines on public reports, Commonweath investment mandate provisions, Prime Minister and Cabinet guidelines on transparency and the Cabinet hand- book on the appointment of board members.
Bloody hell, may as well read Kafka’s entire back catalogue.
The idea someone’s evidence should be entirely ignored because they failed to read every word written about corporate governance in the past century was a stretch, but Sen O’Sullivan was right to point out the inquiry was into NAIF, not the miles of legislation it operated under.
He poked a few more holes, discovering most witnesses had no idea 18 tourism projects were on NAIF’s potential funding books – 22 per cent of applications and more than any other sector – and the oft-repeated comment that only one board member was from Northern Australia was just plain wrong.
Hardly anyone realised NAIF’s $50 million loan cost threshold was only a guide and not mandatory, even though its first project off the ranks was for a $17 million shipping upgrade in Western Australia.
Here’s the big one: Adani will not, and cannot, get a loan for its proposed Carmichael coal mine.
The Queensland Government has written to NAIF saying it does not support the project, and it is enshrined in NAIF’s charter that no loan can be awarded to a project that is opposed by its relevant state or territory government.
Also, NAIF’s 2017-18 Corporate Plan sets out its target of providing three to five loans with investments of between $300 million and $1 billion, and total project capital value of between $750 million and $2.5 billion. That’s all on track. But nobody would ever know that unless they were the sort of self-flagellating Kafka devotee who mulls over corporate plans.
NAIF has crawled so far up its own farce that the general public has no idea what it is doing.
From the outside looking in, it appears to be rich people paying rich people to keep rich people in a job. That’s not the case, but the language in this week’s inquiry did not help.
When asked why the State Government had been told a proposal to build a rail line to Adani’s mine was inactive, whereas The Australian was told days later it was “on our active list of inquiries”, NAIF’s boss suggested there were two definitions of inactive.
One for government and internal use, and one for the media. What? If you are dealing with $5 billion of taxpayers’ money, you really should know how to talk.
NAIF HAS CRAWLED SO FAR UP ITS OWN FARCE THAT THE GENERAL PUBLIC HAS NO IDEA WHAT IT IS DOING.