Refer to the ‘Paris end' of Collins Street.
Have a loud conversation on your mobile on the tram.
Trample the small child in front of you and elbow the old lady out of your way so you get to try Gelato Messina's zany new flavour.
Take the Melbourne/ Sydney stand-off very, very seriously. Sydney is a one-night stand/ Melbourne is for life; Sydney is the blonde/ Melbourne is the the brunette, et cetera.
Bring this up often.