STAR LETTER
Chatter ‘gems’ overheard in the Total Film office this month… * “I’m a big fan of downpipe. The colour, I mean.” * “If you just want to talk about sweaters, that’s fine.” * “It’s as if Andrei Tarkovsky had shot Charlotte’s Web.”
★
I dearly love him, but after recently watching Tom Hardy in Capone, I think I now know the secret behind those brilliant, emotionally charged performances: they’re all clearly based on Looney Tunes cartoon characters. Capone is a dead ringer for Bugs Bunny (even down to the carrots); Venom’s Eddie Brock apes Elmer Fudd; and Foghorn Leghorn was surely the inspo for The Revenant’s Fitzgerald. The Krays in Legend are basically Sylvester and Tweetie Pie, while Mad Max is (Fury) Road Runner. And there’s got to be a Pepé Le Pew homage for when he inevitably plays Napoleon.
ELLIE PALMER-HARGREAVES, VIA EMAIL
Inspired by classic kids’ icons, you say? You may well be on to something, going by what Hardy told TF in 2012: “I will, when I build certain characters, take a soupçon of different things. Like Kermit The Frog. I’ll put a bit of Kermit in there...” Tinker Tadpole
Soldier Spy, anyone? Ellie and everyone with a letter printed here will receive a copy of Nic Cage vs. theme-park mascots action-horror Willy’s Wonderland, available now on digital, DVD and Blu-ray via Signature Entertainment. Didn’t send an address? Email it! Don’t miss your free Willy!
love the Snyderverse, and dark superhero films can be just as good as the lighthearted ones. Critics’ reviews are getting further away from what viewers want. Please try to keep the audience in mind. RORY RAFTERY, HORSHAM
Idon’t consider myself a film-editing expert, but I think I see why Zack Snyder’s Justice League clocks in at nearly four hours. It’s because he’s fallen asleep on the slow-motion button during the editing process. You could cut at least one or two hours out just by playing the film at normal speed. I do like Zack’s films but not half as much as he likes slow motion. I understand now why he hasn’t directed a Fast & Furious movie – they’d have to rename it Slow & Laborious.
TOM, VIA EMAIL
We may not have been Super Friend-ly to ZSJL, but look on the bright side: three stars is 50 per cent up on the rating we gave the 2017 cut. As for the use of slow-mo, is there anyone willing to leap – in a time-distending, tableaux-esque fashion – to its defence? Or are you more #ReleaseTheFasterCut?
STATE WE’RE IN
In issue 310’s Dialogue you answered a reader by including the phrase ‘state of the art’. Did you know this has been in use since the 1940s? How about the next time you’re describing a combat super-cycle you try “a stellar example of incredible creativity” or “an astounding illustration of innovation”? Far be it from me to dictate to your writers, but you have to admit that ‘state of the art’ needs to be ‘put out to pasture’! IMHO, that is. STACEY B. PLOTTS, OHIO
Actually, according to Wikipe-, um, our specialist sources, ‘state of the art’ goes back to at least 1910 – so we’re even further behind the times than you thought. Ha! But point taken: as Samuel Goldwyn once said, “Let’s have some new clichés.”
RE: DRESSING BALANCE
In reference to Matty Rasker’s letter in issue 309, I feel I must defend Malcolm & Marie against the charge of dullness. I found it compelling, its rhythms perfectly judged thanks to the exceptionally skilful writing. However, no review I’ve seen mentions the depressing trope it upholds, that of the fully dressed man and half-naked young woman. Zendaya drapes herself about the place in her smalls for a portion of the running time while John David Washington disappointingly remains clothed throughout, a malegaze choice I’d hoped in the Time’s Up/ Me Too era filmmakers would’ve deemed regressive.
ZOE E. WHITE, VIA EMAIL
Fair point – for a film with so many layers, it doesn’t always distribute them evenly. Also seems rather reckless of Malcolm to stay dressed in a white shirt, given the way he wolfs down that mac and cheese.
JACE TO JACE
One of my nerdish habits is to collect coincidences. I recently watched Ode To Joy, a romcom starring Martin Freeman; then, the same day, Borat Subsequent Moviefilm. When I was entering the titles in my current ‘Films I Have Seen Book’, as numbers 12,886 and 12,887 respectively, I noticed that the former was directed by Jason Winer and the latter by Jason Woliner. Now that’s a coincidence. I suppose this is an example of channelling your OCD.
KEVERNE WESTON, LONDON
What better way to channel it than into the world’s greatest art form (films, that is, though list-keeping does run a close second)? Makes you wonder if Winer/Woliner have seen each other’s movies and gone, “Hey, that’s not how you spell my na-, oh, I didn’t direct this one. As you were.” Readers: send more film coincidences. On the exact same Sunday, if you want to properly freak us out.