Socials outage outrage
FORGET Covid, forget China, forget an attack by the Klingons and zombies, forget flying 5m crocs from Groper Creek, forget Godzilla or Podcastzilla, forget potholes and stingers, ringers and cow poo slingers, there’s a bigger world catastrophe and apostrophe, for us, and it happened a week ago …
YES, Facebook collapsed! Or in my case it would be “ugly face” book.
Some of the young staff had to have counselling and are still away.
Dreadful, eh? It must have been a shocking experience, they had to talk to each other! Imagine it, no hash tags or drop downs, and worse still no settings!
How can we cope? And no “click ons”, which are obviously related to the Klingons, except the latter wont let go.
Terrible times for many, even Instagram packed up, so much so that we nearly went back to the telegram!
As an aside, isn’t it sad no more telegrams at weddings, those wonderful messages often from far away, that you can keep.
Now of course at the wedding the best man may have to say, ‘sorry mate, we didn’t hear from your mum in Victoria, sending love for your wedding day, you see the Wi-fi is down”.
No more little bits of yellow paper to keep forever. Sorry, better explain about all this from a generation ago, you see telegrams were on yellow paper and typed by … actually … never mind.
Yes back to the collapse of Facey, there became an even bigger issue, or in this case with tissue, what on earth were we to check in the loo?
Without Facebook to look at, all you had to look at was the door, the dunny roll holder, the ceiling, or wondering who just walked in, and other unmentionables, the world we know now, had collapsed.
And never have the camera uncovered while your sitting, or standing there I reckon!
Bosses were horrified, work was done on time.
Things were amiss at my home too, much to my horror, my dog Bing wouldn’t talk to me, he was certainly off his kibble, until I realised the outage of Facebook had affected him terrierbly.
I've told him to stay away from social media, he has his own special doggie account on Facebark and Instagrowl.
Facey and Insty are back thank goodness, now we can all go about our relaxed daily lives, with everything we do known by everybody, everything we say misinterpreted, how we look insulted, what's happening in the world exaggerated, and, sadly for Bing, computer Spam is not meat in a tin the size of a laptop.
On a totally different subject, a little selfish of me, but I’d love to mention a couple of celebrations last weekend.
Twelve years ago Saturday my dear mate Troy Rogers and I returned from Afghanistan, and on that day, and sadly, Troy missed it, his beautiful daughter Georgia was born.
Happy birthday Georgia!
Also I went to a sensational Greek wedding for Andrew and Alysha Mckeown, great kids, congratulations. The Greeks really know how to have a fantastic time, and very clever of the reception place having paper plates! Joking. Happy days to all
Ooroo
Ps. See you at Oasis open day Saturday.