Plan­ning for new start

Mak­ing new-year res­o­lu­tions has never been eas­ier

Tweed Daily News - - NEWS - ON THE COUCH SARAH BERGMAN Gestalt Psy­chother­a­pist Sarah Bergman pro­vides coun­selling through the prac­tice of Gestalt Psy­chother­apy for in­di­vid­u­als, fam­i­lies and cou­ples. Sarah is an ac­cred­ited mem­ber of (PACFA) and her pri­vate prac­tice is si­t­u­ated in Tw

HAPPY new year. Do you have a new-year res­o­lu­tion? There is some­thing emo­tion­ally en­tic­ing about the prospect of turn­ing over a new leaf at this time of year.

The new be­gin­ning, the clean slate, this year is the year of me. We are all perched on the precipice of the new year and the an­tic­i­pa­tion of what it might bring.

It is the time of year our aware­ness per­co­lates around what we may need to do to bet­ter in our lives or our­selves in 2019.

New-year res­o­lu­tions are an al­most uni­ver­sal ac­tiv­ity that brings hope.

Res­o­lu­tions usu­ally come in the form of life­style changes, are work re­lated or so­cial goals. In essence newyear res­o­lu­tions re­late to chang­ing be­hav­iours that have be­come rou­tine, ha­bit­ual and pos­si­bly prob­lem­atic.

So how do we stick to our new-year res­o­lu­tions? Re­searchers found that, in or­der to ad­here to your res­o­lu­tion, it needs to be en­joy­able not just im­por­tant.

In other words, we make the mis­take of be­liev­ing that we will stick to the plan to at­tain the goal be­cause it is clearly im­por­tant to do.

In­stead what re­ally mat­ters is how much we can take plea­sure from our ini­tial ef­forts to start anew.

In conjunction with en­joy­ment, it is im­por­tant to un­der­stand bet­ter why we tend not to look af­ter our­selves in the first place.

Is it a lack of mo­ti­va­tion due to sad­ness or stress? Is it be­cause we put oth­ers first? Is it poor time man­age­ment or some­thing else?

In or­der to change your day-to-day be­hav­iour, you also need to change how you think about your­self and how you tackle the new-year res­o­lu­tion. For ex­am­ple, be re­al­is­tic with your­self, less is more, just have one res­o­lu­tion; do it with oth­ers; tell some­one your res­o­lu­tion or don’t de­pend­ing on what mo­ti­vates you best; ac­cept lapses as part of the process and make your res­o­lu­tion spe­cific, achiev­able, en­joy­able and time bound.

Un­help­ful habits take years to be­come in­grained so be pa­tient with your­self and take the op­por­tu­nity to learn about your­self.

For ex­am­ple, ask your­self if you do give in where, when or how. Bbe­come fa­mil­iar with what giv­ing in looks like for you and try not to get de­spon­dent just be­gin again and start afresh each day.

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