‘I’m learning to love myself’
After a trying year, the ‘BH90210’ star – and breast cancer survivor – emerges triumphant and stronger than ever
To her millions of fans Shannen Doherty has always seemed like someone with an iron will. In reality, Doherty says, the last few years of her life would test even the steeliest of resolves. Since 2015 the veteran actress has battled breast cancer, undergone a mastectomy, encountered a devastating fire that nearly destroyed her Malibu home and lost one of her oldest friends and former co-stars, Luke Perry, who died in March. Still, despite the heartache, “I think there is always a positive to learn through everything,” says Doherty, 48. “I really believe that God only gives us what we can handle. Maybe I’m too stubborn, so he gives it to me in very big, impactful ways.”
Now, armed with a passion for her work within the cancer community, as well as a buzzy new role on BH90210 – a reboot of the seminal ’90s series that made her a household name – Doherty is reflective, coming to terms with misconceptions about her Hollywood legacy, appreciating the tenacity of her marriage, and reframing what it means to have a healthy sense of self. “I live each day like it’s an amazing gift,” says Doherty, who has been in remission since 2018. “And I’m trying to do good for others, good for myself and good for the people I love.”
Doherty was diagnosed with breast cancer in March 2015 and immediately jumped into action. She underwent a mastectomy, followed by agonising back-to-back rounds of chemo and then radiation before the reconstruction process (see sidebar), all the while bravely documenting her journey on social media. She says adjusting to her new post-cancer body is still a struggle. “People think once you’re no longer on chemo, you’re fine,” she says. “But your body never fully bounces back. I’ve gained weight. I have scars. And the meds I’m on keep zapping the collagen out of me, so [I’m not] wrinkle-free. I’m critical of myself. I’m still trying to accept who I am now.”
Long days on the Vancouver set of BH90210 “took its toll,” she says. But she’s discovered a newfound friendship with her Beverly Hills, 90210 co-stars after rumours of on-set feuds and bad behaviour during her stint on the original show from 1990 to 1994, which earned her a ‘bad girl’ reputation. “I’m not saying it was all a misunderstanding, but a large portion of it was,” says Doherty of the drama. “Somebody had a problem with me being late, but maybe they didn’t know that my dad was super sick or that I was in a horrible marriage. I didn’t share, or I wasn’t asked.”
Now, nearly three decades later, “it was very interesting to have those conversations”, says Doherty. “We’re all adults, we’re in a different place, and you kind of start over. But we started over closer.” Losing Perry, who died on March 4 from a stroke at the age of 52, was an unexpected blow. “It’s like a jigsaw puzzle with one of the most important pieces gone,” she says of his glaring absence during shooting. “Luke was so quiet, but his death had an enormous impact.” Back home in Malibu
“I’m still trying to figure out how to accept who I am now, as opposed to some image in my head”
Doherty is all the more grateful for a respite and for the home she nearly lost in the Woolsey Fire last November (while her neighbourhood was forced to evacuate, she was eventually able to return to her home). “I am very lucky,” says Doherty. “But [I remember] looking – and my dog was with me and my husband and my mom – and I’m like, ‘OK, I survived cancer. I can lose my house’.”
She also credits cancer and its life-altering capacity for growth with strengthening her marriage to Kurt Iswarienko. “We were going through some growing pains,” says Doherty of their relationship pre-illness. “We would lock horns on things and not speak for a couple of days. [Cancer] solidified us. We look at each other with such profound respect.” The couple have considered starting a family (because of her treatment, Doherty is in early menopause and cannot get pregnant; they’ve weighed the options of a donor egg or adoption), but “we haven’t landed on anything” says Doherty. “Sometimes it’s easier to avoid. And I have big ideas for how to help [advocate] in the cancer community. That’s where my focus is now.” Ultimately Doherty doesn’t have to look far to see how such monumental clarity has affected her life. “I’m kinder to myself now,” she says. “And so much more powerful than I was before.”•