Survey reveals certain people don’t want to answer calls
Once upon a time, the sound of your phone ringing would elicit excitement. Now though? Pure panic. At least if you’re young. According to a survey of 2,000 people carried out by the price comparison site Uswitch, a quarter of people aged 18 to 34 never actually answer when they’re called. Respondents explained that, after hearing the phone ring, they’d usually ignore it. Others said they’d google the number or text the person back rather than calling them. Nearly 70 per cent of those surveyed said they’d prefer a text to a phone call, while 37 per cent favoured voice notes. Meanwhile, more than half confessed that an unexpected call would lead them to believe they were about to receive some bad news.
It’s something I’ve witnessed at first hand many times. People my age (29) are simply terrified of the phone. We might as well call it something else entirely given how rarely it’s used for telecommunication of any kind. Just last week, I texted a friend: “Can I call you?” only because it felt rude to simply do it unexpectedly. He replied immediately: “That is the most terrifying message you could ever send.”
We did not have that phone call – the prospect was simply too daunting for him. So we sent each other Whatsapp messages and voice notes instead. Just like when a friend rang me a few days later and, instead of answering, I watched it until it stopped, only to message the friend later and apologise for missing her call. I’m not sure why; I was feeling lonely and could have done with a chat. But the anxiety of talking on the phone at that particular moment trumped this feeling. What’s wrong with us? “Whenever I get a phone call from someone I know, my heart skips a beat,” says Ali Korsan, 24. “I think this is the norm for Gen-z, and probably other generations that have grown up with texting. It’s the beauty of being connected all the time but for when it’s convenient to reply. A phone call is usually for something that requires my immediate attention.” It’s not just younger people, either. “I would never call a person randomly out of the blue, just like I wouldn’t knock on their front door unannounced — it’s just not respectful of their personal space or time,” says Sharon Oliverochapman, 47. “If anyone wants to talk to me regarding business, I would book a day and time to have the conversation. This is simply etiquette. As for friends and family, a quick text to ask if they’re free to talk is absolutely necessary, too. It’s a real bugbear of mine when people bombard me with calls unannounced.”
Much of this hesitancy is the result of our increasingly online-first culture. It may have normalised some ways of communication but also rendered others archaic and strange. “It’s important to recognise that the shift away from phone conversations is not solely a result of preference but also reflects broader societal changes and technological advancements,” explains Barbara Santini, a psychologist and relationship adviser. “With the rise of digital communication platforms and social media, individuals have unprecedented access to instant messaging, video calls, and social networking sites. These mediums offer convenience, accessibility, and a sense of interconnectedness, making them increasingly appealing alternatives to traditional phone calls”
It’s true: texting can be more efficient than speaking over the phone. You can consider what it is you want to say, and ensure you’re articulating it in the best possible way. It can be particularly helpful in conflict resolution, giving you enough time and space to express yourself to someone who has hurt or upset you. That said, all this comes with a heady dose of angst, too. For some, a paragraph of text may be just as spine-chilling as a phone call, indicating that something is wrong. It’s even worse on instant messaging platforms, such as Whatsapp, which are more spontaneous and often leave you with a wave of anxiety given the overwhelming access you have to people’s communication styles. Read receipts, “last seen” notifications and similar features provide us with a deluge of information we simply don’t need and would be spared when we’re just talking over the phone.
“Texting is unemotional and can get misinterpreted,” says Sonja Sha-williams, Ayurvedic practitioner and author.