Journey to Self-Discovery

Ayana Miller

I am a Transformational Kingdom Woman. Why that name? It was resonated to me during sleeping hours. The Birth of my Transformational Journey began from being in an abusive relationship, meaning mental abuse. I was in a relationship where I was ill-treated, cheated on, used, and mentally abused.

I started thinking something was wrong with me, that I was not pretty enough, not the right complexion. I was so confused. I accepted all the negative remarks, insults, and even tried to be someone else to fit into crowds to be liked. There were many nights I cried myself to sleep, even asking God why me. Just to note, it also started where I was treated less than growing up as a child. My grandmother favored my cousin more than me, and that hurt. I was even sexually touched as a child and kept that to myself until adulthood. All these kept me stagnant and afraid to speak, because of what others would say, and that comes from culture and society.

I left my home at age twenty-something, got into wrong relationships because I thought that was love, since I was not shown the true love from my father. Listen, that could break you. But it's only God and Him sending people my way to save me and remind me how much I am loved by Him and beautiful. I got the strength to come out of that last relationship and eventually got married. I started to find my true identity. I know I have a purpose, and God has me here for a reason. I am His child, just as everyone else. I started to learn to be comfortable in my own skin.