"[An] insightful manual . . . offers men tools to best support female rape victims in their lives. McEvoy defines basic vocabulary and elucidates how victims can experience a variety of complicated emotions, from anger or shame to feelings of isolation . . . McEvoy handles his topic with sensitivity and is careful not to overstate the man’s role in the healing process—it’s vital for women to maintain total agency throughout—while still making clear that they can play an important support role. This is an ideal road map for male partners or friends who want to help, but don’t know where to start."
Description
Rape is, unfortunately, an all-too-common violent crime usually perpetrated against women. For victims, the process of sharing information about an assault with loves ones or reporting the crime to the police can be harrowing, embarrassing, and painful. The responses of others can greatly affect the way a rape survivor copes. Often the men who are closest to rape survivors—intimate partners, friends, and family members—are simply unprepared to offer the right assistance. The wrong word or action may trigger an unexpected reaction. Written by Alan W. McEvoy, PhD, When the Subject Is Rape is designed specifically to illustrate the role men can play as allies in a woman’s recovery from rape.
This book examines the many aspects of rape. It looks at both the short- and long-term emotional and psychological impacts rape can have on a woman, what she can expect during the prosecution of her rapist, and strategies that can help her to recover from the assault. It discusses how the men in her life should communicate with her and address her needs throughout her recovery, and describes how they should conduct themselves to avoid unintentionally causing her more pain. It also explains how to identify changes in behavior that may signal an undisclosed rape. Even if a rape goes unreported, both the emotional consequences and the need for support throughout the recovery process will still be present.
Rape is not an easy subject to discuss. Sexual violence can radically alter the course of a woman's life. By understanding the trauma associated with rape and other forms of sexual assault, men can play an important part in a woman's healing process. When the Subject Is Rape provides information that can help men to create a climate of support for the empowerment of women who are on the path to recovery.
Reviews
"[A] wonderful and practical book of guidance . . . a major contribution to our society."
"A timely and much needed support guide . . . the timing of this important publication could not be more propitious: the topic of sexual harassment has become a constant in the news and media. Dr. McEvoy provides better understanding of the implications, complexities, and the need for comprehension of the impact of rape and sexual abuse on victims and especially on those who support the victim . . . this is a strong book."
“[E]xtremelyinsightful . . . McEvoy writes in a straightforward but empathetic style, neverletting the reader lose sight of the book’s fundamental goal: to help a manbecome a better ally if a woman he loves has been raped. By organizing thenarrative into clear topics, chapter by chapter, he allows readers to come toterms with their limitations and expand their perspective . . . shine[s] a lighton topics from immediate and the long-term consequences, to rape’s impact onsexual intimacy, to working with law enforcement, to the use of rape as a hatecrime, and finally, the long journey beyond trauma to healing. There’s acontinuous sense of humanity and sensitivity to McEvoy’s guidance . . . Withthis book in hand, men can help become positive allies, and support recoveryand growth in the face of profound trauma.”