Be a better, not bitter wife
A woman is a beautiful part of God’s creation. But she has potential to spoil her Godgiven beauty by being contentious. Solomon says in the
book of Proverbs, “A continual dripping on a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike.”
We have all experienced the rainfall that persists all day long and we wish it would stop. Many have also experienced a dripping tap when the washer is worn out. The dripping can make the most horrible sound on an aluminium sink or when the drops are falling from a height onto a flat surface. After some time of listening to the dripping sound it becomes annoying.
The only way to stop the tap from dripping is to change the washer. The illustration drives the point home.
The only way to stop a contentious attitude is to change the attitude. Instead of having a bitter attitude, the contentious woman can cultivate a caring attitude. This will make her better, not bitter. When Solomon says it is better to live far from a contentious woman, the implication is that if he doesn’t go far enough she will inflict pain and suffering
on him. It can be physical, mental or emotional pain. Some women have mastered the art of inflicting pain. A contentious woman’s words are usually cutting and hurtful. Because of her contentious spirit, she doesn’t choose her words discreetly.
In fact, the more hurtful her words, the better she feels. Sticks and stones may break bones, but words crush the spirit, the inner person. Words that are spoken harshly and with a cutting tongue do more harm than good. Solomon says, ‘A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.’ This is the best advice one can get because it emanates from God’s word.
This is not man’s opinion. Ladies, if you are going to be successful wives and exemplary mothers to your children, don’t be contentious. Don’t become bitter or resentful. Remember that bitterness and resentment are choices that you make.
You choose to be bitter and angry and resentful and unforgiving.
You are therefore responsible for your choices. You cannot say you are bitter because someone made you bitter. It is a choice for which you are responsible. Remember, a woman is at her best when she is elegant, exhibiting her true inner beauty and calm in her spirit and gentle with her words.
The opposite of a contentious woman is a gracious woman who is filled with tender loving care, respect, honour, is supportive and responds to the love of her husband.
A gracious woman draws on the resources of her rich character. She is gracious with her words and actions and seeks to build and not destroy her marriage and family.
She makes her husband proud and gives him respect as her leader. She submits to his godly leadership and loves to stand by her man. She does not challenge him unnecessarily or out of a rebellious spirit. She is strong in character.