Get On The Bus
When the faecal irritant hits the proverbial fan smart civil servants bring out all their belt-tightening artillery. The whole civil service woke up to some horror memo that proposes that they travel by bus between Francistown and GC.
The memo doesn’t actually discriminate and so the assumption is that it applies to everyone who gets his or her paycheck from Honourable Peggy Serame who is the official government bean counter.
However, for the more experienced, the civil service has 2 clear demarcations, the official civil service and the executive. So before you get excited just know that F scales won’t be in that bus. We cannot have a situation where the executive is pushed into a bus with their juniors. At least that is how it works on these shores.
I suggest the drivers must be carefully chosen so that a whole busload of important civil servants are not stranded in Makomoto which is a mere 50km from Francistown. Government drivers have a tragic physiological flaw where they are suddenly attacked by a bout of sleep when they are about to reach their destination.
Cases of poor vision are all too common too especially when dusk sets. Officers from Nastyland usually claim that it is a sneaky attempt to claim night out allowance but I don’t believe that. My belief is that this is a medical condition that the Sir Ketumile Teaching Hospital must investigate and provide solutions for. Of course we all appreciate that the hospital is choking under the unrelenting pressure of covid but it should be a matter of priority as soon as covid packs its bags to Wuhan.
That means in the meantime they will have to make do with sleep-afflicted drivers with poor eyesight. Sigh! Government must create a post of Bus Coordinator. This is the equivalent of a bus conductor in public transport but with more clout and more benefits such as medical aid, entertainment allowance, dog allowance and risk allowance.
The risk allowance might be a surprise to many but anyone who stands next to a rickety bus door for more than 400km needs that type of allowance.
We cannot use conductor. Such nomenclature is too tainted with rogue and questionable behavior. Imagine a whole director being called a bus conductor. They would flatly refuse to get inside the bus. The position should be around D2 level so that they have the official power ranking to control everyone inside that bus.
Protocol is very important in government circles so we cannot have a B4 employee ordering around people that decide his/her annual increment. You could be marked down during performance appraisal time because you ordered your boss to get on the bus, sit down and keep quiet.
All the more reason why this should be reserved for a high-ranking officer. Our government has time and again punted citizen empowerment. Dijo Bagolo industry is one of the more important industries in our country and unofficially contributes 0.0006% to the
GDP. Only those not steeped in political issues will scoff at this and dismiss it as miniscule. 120% of Dijo Bagolo staff are voters that actually turn up at the voting booth and use the same patience of waiting for the Maun-bound midnight bus to wait their turn during election time.
A bus full of civil servants represents a great opportunity for the Dijo Bagolo industry. Usually people at around D scales get their trip supplies at franchised joints. So in Mahalapye they would want the bus to stop at Wimpy and Whistle Stop while in Palapye it would be Nandos, Chicken Licken and Wimpy.
The Bus Coordinator will be charged with steering the bus to the Dijo Bagolo spots. The Bus Coordinator has to also ensure the seating arrangements is sorted out. There obviously should be a VIP section where directors and their assistants will sit.
Obviously the troublesome backseat must always remain vacant. People who occupy that part of any bus are usually caught up in a wave of rogue behavior much more irritating than the discussion to ban liquor or not. It doesn’t matter whether one has an assortment of Best Behaved awards.
Once they reach the backseat that is thrown out the bus window. Otherwise should the seating arrangement be rubbish he will be seeking alternative employment after just one trip.