Some­times true love is worth a few years’ wait

The So­cial’s Cyn­thia Loyst on how she fell for her hus­band after he up­graded his fa­cial hair

Bayview Post - - Currents -

Cyn­thia Loyst, co-host on CTV’s

and founder of FindYourPlea­sure.com, knew her hus­band Ja­son for years be­fore they ever spoke a word to each other. Now after 19 years to­gether, it sure seems it was worth the wait for that first con­ver­sa­tion. Here, Loyst tells us how it all went down. How they met We met in stages. We both went to York Univer­sity and were in the film and video depart­ment. I re­mem­ber see­ing him for the first time with his long, dark, flow­ing hair; side­burns with a strap of hair across his chin; and his Fish­bone T-shirt and think­ing: “Hmm, that guy is so cute, ex­cept I don’t un­der­stand that fa­cial hair.”

For years we or­bited around the same peo­ple and places but never re­ally spoke. Years later, after grad­u­a­tion, I was hired by a mu­tual friend to belly dance in a mu­sic video, and Ja­son was hired as the di­rec­tor of photography. I no­ticed him again and felt he had im­proved on his fa­cial hair, but we still didn’t speak.

We even­tu­ally ended up at the same party, and fi­nally he came up and chat­ted with me, and I gave him my num­ber. The first date Our very first date was at In­som­nia at Bloor and Bathurst streets. At that time, I lived down the street from there, so I was ba­si­cally a reg­u­lar at the res­tau­rant and asked him to meet me there.

We sat at the bar. I still re­mem­ber the soft, grey sweater he was wear­ing and how good he smelled. I had been sin­gle for a while and had ex­pe­ri­enced some less-than-stel­lar dates, so I had de­vel­oped a list of finely tuned ques­tions that could help me weed out the duds quickly. By the end of the date, he had sailed through my ques­tions with fly­ing colours. We got mar­ried where he pro­posed — at the time it was a beau­ti­ful res­tau­rant called the Boiler House. It has since changed to a Mex­i­can place called El Ca­trin. I have heard great things about it but haven’t brought my­self to check it out, yet, be­cause I’m still kind of heart­bro­ken that it’s not the same place. The off­spring Balanc­ing ca­reers and mar­riage It’s hard. I think we have the ben­e­fit of work­ing in sim­i­lar in­dus­tries (tele­vi­sion and film), so we know how crazy the hours can be. And also, we have been to­gether for al­most 19 years now, so we know each other very well and can tell when the other is start­ing to fray.

“That guy is so cute, ex­cept I don’t un­der­stand that fa­cial hair.”

Se­cret to suc­cess We give each other lots of space and room to be in­di­vid­u­als. I re­ally value that. We also have had and con­tinue to have some hard con­ver­sa­tions at times. Fi­nally, hav­ing a ther­a­pist to check in with (ei­ther in­di­vid­u­ally or as a cou­ple) ev­ery once in a while is in­cred­i­bly im­por­tant, I think, for any cou­ple. Life after re­tire­ment Read­ing, writ­ing and eat­ing on a beach for me. Although I’m not op­posed to Ja­son’s vi­sion of an olive grove in Spain.

Cyn­thia and Ja­son have been to­gether for al­most 19 years

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