For most of us, simple flirting is simply futile
Both women and men fail to get the message
Reading signals and expressions from women has never been my strong suit. In fact, it’s a miracle that I managed to get married.
Of all the signals from the opposite sex that I’m bad at interpreting, flirting is No. 1. And it turns out I am not the only one. According to new research from the University of Kansas, only a third of men are able to tell when they are being flirted with.
Flirting. Just the mention of the word sends shivers down my spine — terrible memories flash up of parties and dinners from my days as a single man.
There I would be, happily milling about, glugging down the booze and chatting inanely to some vague friend when he would say, “Oh, have you met Madeleine? She’s a pal of my sister,” and I would say, “Oh, hello hello.” And then the stream of nonsense chat would continue pouring out of my mouth.
Sometime later, I might catch Madeleine looking at me oddly. Polite being that I am, I’d brush it off as some tic the poor girl had to live with. Then, after a while, I would push off and go and bother someone else. At the end of the party, the vague friend would sidle up and say: “So, what about you and Madeleine, eh? You two were getting on famously.”
And I would say: “Really? Are you sure?”
And he would say: “Didn’t you see the way she was fiddling with her purse/rolling her eyes/ being sick into the pot plants? It’s clear as day: fancies you rotten.”
And I would honestly have no idea if he was kidding me or not. For the only way in which a woman could have unambiguously flirted with me would have been to wear a sandwich board emblazoned with: “I AM FLIRTING WITH YOU, YOU IDIOT.”
But get this: when it comes to diagnosing flirtatious behaviour, men are astonishingly accurate — compared, that is, to women. According to the Kansas study, only 18 per cent of women get the message when we men are beaming out the lurr-vve waves.
What do I have to do to make him see that I like him? Might as well give up and just tell him. Flirting appears to be lost on most of us, says a new study from the University of Kansas.
Volk Furniture, St. Charles Coffee Table (www.volkfurniture.com): A mix of materials that is sophisticated and stylish. Copper, white oak, and laminated white glass make this coffee table perfect in any way and shows that mixing materials is more than...