Nesbitt sets a high standard
As tough as Christine Nesbitt is on elite, worldclass 1,000- and 1,500-metre speedskating fields, she can be absolute murder on herself. Merciless. Pitiless. “Yeah, that’s what a few people are saying,’’ acknowledged the reigning women’s Grand World Cup recipient.
“That I beat myself up too much. My coach was saying it just (Thursday): ‘That’s one of your greatest qualities but it’s also one of your greatest weaknesses’.”
It’s not that Nesbitt isn’t posting the results, gathering the spoils of conquest.
She simply isn’t satisfied with how, is all.
One person’s hovel is another’s palace, of course. As miffed as she might be with her skating, the lady has already, this season, added three individual gold, one silver and a bronze to her vast World Cup collection.
The frustration at not being as flawless as expected, she readily admits, has pushed her to amp up the workload.
Arguably to the detriment of the natural fluidity that comes so effortlessly, so organically, when she’s at her peak.
“It’s just ... hard. Because that’s who I feel I am — someone who’s worked really hard to get what I need. And so when someone tells me I’ve been working TOO hard, I’m like ‘Well, what else am I supposed to do? That’s what I do!’
“I’ve been doubting myself. It gets complicated. Am I driving myself crazy? Or is something else the problem? Like, what’s going on?
“Just so many question marks.’’
A year ago, during the Canadian Single Distance Championships on her way to one of the great international seasons by a Canadian long-tracker, Christine Nesbitt virtually swept the board, topping the podium in two 500s, the 1,000, 1,500 and 3,000.
Yet on Day 1 of the 2013 edition, Thursday, she had to settle for the second step, slightly below Brittany Schussler, in the 3,000,
In the obligatory gripand-grin podium photo afterwards, the strain was evident.
Her mood had improved, slightly, Friday, after regaining the top step in the 1,500 metres, winning a head-tohead battle with Schussler in the afternoon’s final pairing, in 1:56.48.
“Yesterday,’’ she admitted, “I felt like I was beating my head against the wall.
“Look at my time the first four laps. Pretty good. But the level of effort it took me to skate those four laps showed up in the last three laps.
“I was really mad at myself.
“I’ve been mad at myself all fall. The frustration has been building and building and building to the point where I’ve almost been feeling ... hopeless.’’
There are any number of skaters scattered across this globe, of course, who only in their wildest dreams could aspire to be so “hopeless.”
“Yeah, I guess,’’ she sighed, sounding far from convinced. “I’ve been really kind of struggling on my technique. I’ve been working really hard on it. I wasn’t happy with my race (Thursday).
“So today, I was still really upset in the morning. Struggling with it. With how I was going to approach the race and if there was anything that I could actually change. ’Cause I felt like I tried my hardest yesterday and I wasn’t able to do anything I wanted.
“I usually just go out as hard as I can in the 1,500 and skate smooth, but I just haven’t had that kind of ability to turn my top speed into smooth skating lately. So I kind of eased off at the start, didn’t go quite as hard, just tried to settle into the race as I would normally and ... relax.
“Not be afraid of not getting my normal top speed.’’
In other results Friday, Winnipeg’s Tyler Derraugh earned the men’s 1,000-metre championship while Lucas Makowsky, of Regina, snared gold in the punishing 5,000.
But given the surprising result Thursday, all eyes at the Olympic Oval were fixed on Nesbitt and how she’d react, respond, to the obvious frustration of her 3,000 race.
“The start wasn’t fast for me, at least the first 700 metres. But because I was really smooth — or at least compared to how I have been skating — I was able to have two good last laps, which really did surprise me. So I’m happy about that, anyway.
“It’s a step in the right direction. I don’t feel like the problem is solved. But maybe it gives me that ability to relax like one or two per cent more. And that can make all the difference.
“Everybody tells me I look tense; that I’m trying really hard. And you know what? I am.’’
Self-satisfaction is not something Christine Nesbitt admits to being very good at. The concept does not come easy to her. She’s a striver. A doer.
“People say that to me all the time. My teammates. Friends. People who know me well. And, I mean, I know that. I’m still skating well enough to win medals.
“But I feel I’m the only one who truly knows the potential that I have. And how close I am to that. And that’s what I’m in search of.’’