Best worst romantic comedy movies for Valentine’s viewing
Aparticular breed of romantic comedies are the Timbits of pop-culture consumables: you know they aren’t good for you, but if there’s one right there in front of you, you can’t help but gobble it down in all its sticky-sweet goodness and ride the sugar high until you crash.
Now, I’m not talking the good rom-coms (The Proposal, When Harry Met Sally), the bad (The Ugly Truth, New Year’s Eve) or even the ugly (Gigli).
Rather, these are the movies that you know are bad, but still take joy — and not a small degree of comfort — in watching. Repeatedly. While wearing your jammies.
Like many of their brethren in the genre, they are trite, predictable, formulaic and feature mediocre acting. But if we only consumed what was good for us, we’d all be Margaret Atwood-spouting literati who existed on a diet of quinoa and PBS. And where is the fun in that? Here are five of the best worst romantic comedies to indulge in on Valentine’s Day (viewing partner optional).
1. Catch & Release If this isn’t the sweetest meet-cute in film history, I don’t know what is: Gray (Jennifer Garner) is crying in the bathtub during her fiancee’s wake when she finally meets her intended’s best friend, Fritz (Timothy Olyphant). As etiquette dictates, though, she waits until he’s done being intimate with a catering assistant on the bathroom counter to make his acquaintance.
Their burgeoning love (Gray and Fritz’s, not his and the catering assistant’s) has to overcome that bit of awkwardness, as well as a depressed roommate (Kevin Smith), a besotted roommate (Sam Jaeger) and a woman from the dead fiancee’s secret past, played with screwball delight by Juliette Lewis.
It all goes on way too long, but Olyphant’s badboy charm sparking off Garner’s good girl in need of some edge reels me in every time.
2. Life As We Know It Sure, viewers can feel their strings being pulled in this totally contrived domestic drama, but an orphaned baby and two lookers as the leads? Catnip for guilty-pleasure viewing!
Kathryn Heigl is overachiever Holly; Josh Duhamel is Messer (get it, messy? As in complicated?), a boy-man TV sports producer who loves the bachelor life. They can’t stand each other, so of course they agree to raise their dead best friends’ baby girl together.
It all takes place in a suburban abode guaranteed to give you a serious case of house envy. From the poop on Holly’s face to Messer getting his cabbie to babysit the infant to the airport scene, the flick is a series of unbelievable moments that add up to a whole lot of watchable nothing.
3. Dear John Now, Nicholas Sparks’ movies merit their own “best worst” list, but that’s for another day. Instead, I will point out that this schmaltz fest features a troubled, heroic leading man, as played by Channing Tatum.
(Did I mention he surfs a lot, so he is shirtless much of the time?)
When military man John meets local college girl (Amanda Seyfried) while home on leave, the pair forge a connection no one in their lives really understands.
Well, maybe his lasagna-making autistic dad, played by the always amazing Richard Jenkins.
And did I mention they make out during a rain storm? And his shirt comes off a lot? (Thankfully, researching this piece provides a cover for all of those “Channing Tatum bare bum” Google searches.)
4. Two Weeks Notice
This one is more of a farce than a rom-com, really.
Sandra Bullock and Hugh Grant (who could each be considered a cottage industry offshoot of the genre, not to mention their joint efforts) play a lawyer and her uber-wealthy New York property developer employer, respectively.
So what do these high rollers do in their downtime?
Well, she has to poop while they’re stuck in traffic, so he takes her in hand and runs down an RV to accommodate her needs.
But Bullock and Grant are just so darned winsome together, it’s easy to put aside the movie’s cliches (her parents are aging radicals who fight the good fight; he is a bad boy whom she can deem) and just enjoy the ride to the inevitable happy ending.
Oh, should that have had a spoiler alert on it?
5. The Wedding Date There are a lot of people behaving badly in this one, in addition to some bad acting.
It’s fascinating to watch it all play out, though. And not just for the twist on the Pretty Woman trope, either.
Dermot Mulroney plays a working boy hired by Debra Messing’s character, Kat, to escort her to her sister’s (Amy Adams’) wedding. There’s no funny business, though.
(Really, the film is not that amusing.)
Rather, Kat needs a dream date seeing as the best man (Jeremy Sheffield) is her ex.
Gigolo Nick is more than a pretty face, though, and soon emotions get entangled in their business transaction. Sex is extra though, Nick made that clear when Kat signed on.
And if that’s not a lesson for Valentine’s Day, I don’t know what is.