So, this comedian walks into court ...

Man pleads guilty to assault at comedy club

EDMONTON — A comedian who punched a rival several times at a local comedy club two years ago did so after “constant harassment” by the comic he assaulted, an Edmonton court heard Tuesday.

“This is more a case of professional jealousy than anything else,” defence lawyer Richard Hajduk said.

Lars Callieou pleaded guilty to assault for punching Welby Santos at Yuk Yuk’s in the Century Casino on June 2, 2011.

Alberta Provincial Court Judge Ray Bodnarek gave Callieou a conditional discharge Tuesday, subject to his completion of 18 months of probation.

Crown prosecutor Mark Van Manen told court that Callieou grabbed Santos, threw him into the front doors, and punched him in the face and head about five times.

Callieou left immediately after the incident and drove to a police station to turn himself in.

Santos’ injuries included a swollen left hand from blocking punches and a dime-sized bruise on his face.

Hajduk said Santos harassed, provoked and antagonized Callieou prior to the assault and was doing what he could to “aggravate and escalate the conflict.”

Callieou was named funniest new comedian in Alberta in 2004, and Hajduk described him as one of the top comedians in the province.

He has travelled to Iraq and Kuwait to entertain servicemen and women, and has opened for Joan Rivers and Bob Saget.

Court heard that Callieou had talked to police in March 2011 about “constant harassment” from Santos. Hajduk said Callieou feared Santos, who has martial arts training, dressed in black and called himself “ninja.”

The animosity between the two comics culminated when Santos shared an online blog that implied Callieou had been cheating on his girlfriend.

The link was forwarded to Callieou’s then-girlfriend.

Court heard Santos described the conflict in a March 2011 blog post titled “Thanks Jesus or Ninja Vs. Bully Bitchtits.”

“I antagonized a psycho who should be on medication,” Santos wrote. The post remains online.

Hadjuk said Santos set up a Twitter account exclusively to harass Callieou after the June 2011 assault, calling him a homosexual and accusing Callieou of stealing jokes.

Van Manen said there is nothing on the Twitter account to identify definitively whose it is.

Santos was not in court Tuesday and did not provide a victim impact statement.

“I think I’ve learned my lesson,” Callieou told court. “I simply want to get on with my life.”

In his ruling, Bodnarek said a conviction would have “serious repercussions” to Callieou’s employment, as he travels outside Canada often for work.

Bodnarek called the event “completely out of character” and said there is little to no likelihood of it happening again.

“Be nice to people,” Callieou said outside court.