SUAREZ CAN’T HELP BEING WHO HE IS
Uruguay star’s fake act mars conclusion of rather unconvincing win over Egypt
Luis Suarez was in Yekaterinburg on Friday afternoon.
It was as close as he’s going to get to Siberia, the stereotypical furthest place from not only the beautiful game, but everything else.
Soccer’s biggest enigma was supposed to be a grown-up this tournament, a changed man, a saint preparing to make up for a plethora of past wrongs.
Aging manager Oscar Tabarez vouched for this World Cup’s biggest troublemaker, swearing Suarez had a come-to-Jesus moment. This tournament was supposed to be different.
It was just four years ago in Brazil that Suarez sunk his fangs into Italy’s Giorgio Chiellini, earning him a nine-game ban after his “I lost my balance” appeal didn’t hold up.
“What happened in Brazil is part of real life . ... It’s been a lesson for him to achieve greater maturity not only as a footballer but also in other areas away from the football pitch,” Tabarez told reporters before Friday’s unconvincing 1-0 win over Egypt.
“He’s prepared a lot, he’s got the right mindset for this World Cup, and I do believe he’s meeting all my expectations,” Tabarez added.
“He’s very smart, very intelligent, and he comes to the World Cup with a great deal of maturity.”
He nearly made it through an entire World Cup match without any obvious tomfoolery. Then came the final seconds of stoppage time.
Egypt’s top defender, Ahmed Hegazi, stuck his foot in, providing Suarez the opportunity to collapse in agony. If only the drama stopped there.
Uruguay’s all-time leading scorer continued his act, rolling over twice before taking his performance to another level. He grabbed his head at one point before realizing it was his foot that was allegedly injured. So, he reached for it again.
All of a sudden an incident that should have been nothing more than a game-ending, rather soft challenge turned into a booking. In summary, Hegazi deserved better and now must play with a possible yellow card suspension looming in his mind.
These are the moments you wish would be played back postgame for an independent review panel to discipline obvious playacting.
So you can add Friday’s performance to Suarez’s checkered World Cup past — and not for reasons akin to tournament-altering handballs or nibbling on the opposition.
This Suarez Show will be remembered for how historically bad the Barcelona talisman was in front of goal.
In truth, Suarez should have locked up the Golden Boot on Friday in Yekaterinburg.
The well-established antiSuarez crowd took great pleasure in watching Uruguay’s No. 9 fail to hit the target five metres from goal.
They chuckled when Suarez’s second-half breakaway was stoned by the Pharaohs’ 45-yearold goalkeeper.
They revelled in Suarez’s dismay after he dribbled into the goalkeeper in a tight World Cup fixture that was screaming for a goal.
Poor Edinson Cavani, the real grown-up among Uruguay’s strikers, might have had a fourpoint night if Suarez could finish.
Tabarez, who raved about Suarez in the buildup to this World Cup, went quiet postgame after being asked to explain his top striker’s ineptness.
“I don’t discuss individual players at a press conference,” Tabarez responded in what seemed like a rehearsed statement. He’d prepared for the most obvious of questions.
“I never look to point the finger at anyone,” he added. “We are a team, a group. I do not echo what you’ve just said. I believe the team is a whole. I’m never going to discuss a player — especially ones who’ve given glory to Uruguayan football.”
And Suarez very well could bring more, when he’s not embarrassing himself. The most hated player at this tournament could just as easily score a banger — or lose the plot and ruin Uruguay’s tournament.
There aren’t many players in this sport that you hate-watch. Yet we all want to see what Suarez is going to do next. Most want to see him fail.
Unfortunately, he doesn’t fail this bad very often — especially on the biggest stage, this near to Siberia.