Extroverts are unleashing our inner introverts

Social distancing and isolation bring new appreciation for quiet, indoor pursuits

The pandemic has brought joy to many who just want to stay home, read books and talk to the cat — the introverts. It has been a little more difficult for the extroverts — those who like to go out with a crowd and be the life of the party. And all the quiet time over the last few months has been confusing for some of us who thought we were extroverts but who are loving the forced-introvert lifestyle. Are we closet introverts? Fake extroverts? COVID-ERTS?

A few years before the last global pandemic, the Spanish

Flu, sent people scurrying to the safety of their homes, Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung coined the term “introversion.” In the early 1900s, he wrote: “Each person seems to be energized more by either the external world (extroversion) or the internal world (introversion).”

In the 1950s, about the same time vaccines started coming along to stop polio from ravaging tens of thousands of children every year, Swedish neuropharmacologist Arvid Carlsson discovered that dopamine, a hormone that flows in our brains, is also a neurotransmitter that sends messages in our noggins. Since then, plenty of other scientists have linked dopamine, too much or too little, to all manner of things from obesity to Parkinson’s disease to schizophrenia.

That biochemistry also helps determine whether you’d prefer to stay home with the cat or go dance on tables. “Dopamine is known as the reward chemical released in response to pleasures we are anticipating,” says Lisa Kaenzig, dean of William Smith College in upstate New York and a researcher who studies introverted learners.

“The more responsive your brain is to dopamine, like it is for extroverts, the more likely you are to go after quick rewards, that could be anything from money, a new job, to responding to a quick question in class,” she says. “Introverts like to have a little more time to think things through before they’re commenting or answering a question. They need some time to recharge their batteries by being by themselves and enjoying having alone time. Extroverts are the complete opposite.”

But what about extroverts who are enjoying staying home, reading books and talking to the cat (or dog, in the case of this confused extrovert)? Has the pandemic somehow unleashed our inner introvert? Sort of, says Kaenzig, a self-described “raging extrovert.” The pandemic of information accompanying the spread of COVID-19 is wearing us all out, she says.

“There’s so much coming at all of us, so much information. It’s constantly changing. It’s a lot of external stimulation for anybody,” says Kaenzig. “So, I think all of us, even those who are extroverted, it’s like, ‘Ah, I need some time to feel a little bit more quiet.’”

Even if you’re not following the daily news — statues being toppled from their perches everywhere, the rise and fall (and rise) of COVID cases around the corner and across the world — you’re trying to keep up with the endless stream of public health information about when, how and where we can start doing things again.

In the meantime, extroverts, introverts and ambiverts — those in the middle — are keeping in touch over Zoom, Facetime and even good old-fashioned phone calls (where you don’t even have to wear pants, never mind a clean shirt). Years ago, you’d just “pick up the phone” and dial. Now you text each other to make a date or have regularly scheduled calls in your calendar.

Some pals and I have a weekly “Friday Night Girls” named in homage to Cathy Jones’ and Mary Walsh’s CODCO characters. I’ve also found myself on a regular check-in with a bunch of people I grew up with; we call it “Happy Hour.” The last time we all hung out we wouldn’t get happy hour started until at least 9 p.m. But now, that’s when I beg off the call because, well, it’s pretty much bedtime.

“I don’t think it’s a coincidence that people are reaching back to high school friends, to college friends,” says Kaenzig. “People are desperate to connect with times that felt more normal. We’re reaching back for those memories of times when we weren’t worried about all this stuff like we do as adults.”

We certainly weren’t worried about a pandemic back in the day. And now, we don’t talk about it for very long before we get back to sharing our decadesold pictures from a seemingly endless series of drunken parties. The guy mooning the camera is now a high school principal. The one with the joint is a captain of industry. The girl in the bikini is a dentist. We were all dancing on tables then.

And now, we’re all in our houses talking at little screens ‘remembering when’ and looking forward to the day the pandemic, too, is a distant memory.