Backyard chicken farms a birdbrained idea

Naive folks need to be protected from themselves, Will Verboven writes.

The City of Calgary is planning to update its Responsible Pet Ownership Bylaw; one presumes that involves cats and dogs, but no, it appears to include many other animals, including wildlife. The latter has caused feathers to be ruffled as the proposed changes suggest feeding wild animals could become illegal.

One imagines bylaw officers snooping around backyards to catch homeowners illegally feeding a few woodpeckers. Birdhouses will be seized as evidence of criminal intent. Stores could be charged with being accessories to criminal bird feeding by selling birdseed. Thousands of outraged wild bird supporters will be out demonstrating against such draconian bylaws.

It gets worse; thousands of wild birds could starve to death in the winter! Their frozen blood would be on the hands of heartless city councillors who support anti-wild bird bylaws. One is amazed as to who the birdbrains are that hatch these ill-conceived proposed bylaws. But I digress.

The real issue is the possibility of legalizing backyard chickens for egg production. That's now illegal in most parts of Calgary. There are good reasons for that ban; chickens, pigeons and domestic waterfowl can be messy, noisy and odorous in constricted areas if not looked after by attentive and caring owners. Keeping such birds also attracts pesky predators, like magpies, ravens, coyotes and raptors. Did I mention domestic birds can be disease carriers of E. coli, salmonella, avian influenza and other nasty afflictions like worms and lice? I expect none of that matters to folks who believe producing your own eggs is ideologically better and helps break their dependence on the evil corporate capitalist food chain. These are the same folks who fervently believe a brownshelled egg is better than a white-shelled egg.

Notwithstanding the common sense in purchasing a perfectly safe, nutritious and inexpensive white egg in a grocery store, naive folks intent on keeping backyard chickens need to be protected from themselves. A bylaw banning poultry from backyards will save well-meaning but deluded citizens from wasting hundreds if not thousands of dollars on buying chickens, building winterized housing (cold chickens don't lay eggs), buying feed and installing watering and feeding equipment.

It would also save the innocent from the heartbreak and grief of chicks and pet hens suddenly dying or becoming lunch for neighbourhood cats and dogs. After about three years, hens almost stop laying eggs. That means unless you plan to eat them, you have to support them for years in their retirement. That increases your cost per egg, but what the heck even at $2 each, a brownshelled, organic, free-range egg from a happy socially adjusted family chicken is worth it, right?

However, since it seems that having backyard chickens is becoming a politically correct human right for city folks, I suspect Calgary will join the progressive bandwagon with such chicken-friendly places like Vancouver and Victoria. The least Calgary city councillors could do is put some teeth into regulating this over-glorified hobby. Bylaws should require potential city chicken farmers to have the written permission of every neighbour three homes deep in every direction. Housing should be secure, well-lit and heated for the winter. Chickens should be health inspected annually by a veterinarian. Health and animal care standards apply to poultry just as they do to cats and dogs. City chicken farmers need to have liability insurance to cover disease and parasite outbreaks that can spread to humans or pets.

The city should also increase tax assessments on chicken housing. Doesn't such housing, sort of like a backyard suite, increase a home's assessment. Although I suspect many homeowners see a chicken operation next door more as decreasing a home's real estate value.

Having said all that, don't expect much common sense with a new Calgary pet bylaw. But then again, new poultry regulations will require dozens of chicken happiness inspectors.

Now that should warm the hearts of busybody city managers.