Culture shock and homesickness
Tips to cope with new foods, friends, customs, traditions
Culture shock is a common phenomenon and anyone who has travelled far from home has most probably had that experience.
Do you remember the first time you travelled away from home as a grown adult? You were excited about all the new possibilities, new people, new streets and the chance to live out your dreams away from the prying eyes of friends, family and everyone else back home.
You will also remember how that excitement slowly become anger and frustration — suddenly the smallest inconvenience was the fault of the entire city. None of the “friends” around you are like the friends with whom you grew up. Why don’t they make the food here taste better?
The novelty started to wear off and you became too aware of real-life responsibilities. The usual events and traditions that you were so used to simply stopped occurring. The customs and sensibilities that you were brought up on don’t seem to have the desired or intended effect on people. The combination of all these factors is jarring.
CONFUSION
Culture shock is defined as a “sense of confusion and uncertainty sometimes with feelings of anxiety that may affect people exposed to an alien culture or environment without adequate preparation.”
While it may sound common and simple, its causes and effects are quite complicated. However, it is critical to the process of adaptation. Some people even find themselves unable to stay in the host country for very long because they experience extremely strong feelings of homesickness.
When first exposed to a new culture, it is common to miss or misinterpret social cues. It can be very stressful as we want to be accepted and not draw any negative attention to ourselves.
Over time we learn how to read these cues, our language skills improve and mingling becomes easier. But while that is happening, we also start to feel like we are losing our connection to our roots.
There is an obvious lack of familiar sights, symbols, smells and quite literally, every other sensory input. Everything we grew up with and cherish and look to for comfort is gone and all we have left are our memories — at least for the
time being. This is when we feel the need to seek out members of our own nationality.
The process of adaptation occurs in stages. However, not everyone experiences it in equal magnitude. And there are several factors that influence how much and when each of the stages occur.
STAGES OF CULTURE SHOCK
• The Honeymoon Phase: Often experienced in the first few weeks, everything is new and exciting. This is the period of exploration and discovery.
• Irritability and Hostility: This is the part of the process that is associated with culture shock. The systems and processes are different and unfamiliar. Differences suddenly seem like shortcomings and we begin to long for something familiar. The stress of it all can lead to very real physical symptoms. Some people experience chronic fatigue, loss of appetite, nausea. Even basic tasks can seem challenging. The separation from regular routine can result in loss of productivity and trouble with organization.
• Gradual Adjustment: We start to accept that we came with goals and start working on them. We show more interest in talking to people from the host nation and strengthen our relationship with them. We become more familiar with the systems and the environment.
• Adaptation of Biculturalism: We have adjusted and found ways to navigate and switch between our origin culture and the host culture. We have social groups that allow us to stay in touch with our roots and other multicultural groups with whom we participate in social and recreational activities.
• Re-entry Shock: We take everything we learn abroad and go back home, either temporarily or for good. But now we find that the “home” or the concept of it that we idealized is not all that it seemed to be before we left. We learn that some aspects of the host country were subjectively better, which helps us introspect and learn more about ourselves.
It is important to stay grounded and understand feeling this way is completely normal and that the anxiety will ease over time.
COPING SKILLS
There are of course tried and tested methods to cope with culture shock.
• Preliminary Research: A lot of us would know to do this instinctively. But I was surprised to learn how many of my international peers skipped this step. Knowing what to expect or at least having a vague idea of it can really reduce some of the fear and anxiety. When I was growing up in the Middle East, a lot of the shows on TV were Canadian. These days everyone has access to the internet and we all consume the same media, and I would not recommend relying on just movies and television to learn more about a culture.
• Important Information: There are ways to talk to people from the host nation even
before you move. Besides the climate, some other important aspects to look into are the language, dress, food, local customs and greetings, modes of transport, accessing utilities and how to pay for them.
• Bring things from home: Having familiar visual cues really helps with grounding. Seeing decorations and knickknacks from home help to reduce the feeling of isolation on especially anxious days. If possible, bring non-perishable food items, and learn to cook a few dishes from your native cuisine. Not only does that help you ease into acclimating your palette to new tastes, but cooking and sharing food with friends is a great bonding activity.
• Make goals: Some of us are only here temporarily, try to make goals that help you socialize with the local residents. Immersion is widely regarded as the best way to improve your language skills. Challenge yourself to talk to a new person every other day, even if it’s only at work or school.
• Keep in touch: Call home and let your family and friends check in with you regularly. My parents and I have agreed that it is impractical for us to talk on a daily basis. But some of my peers do indeed call home every single day and catch up with events back home.
Shaalika Jagadishwaran was born in India and grew up in the Middle East. A graduate in marketing, she moved to Cape Breton in early 2020, just before the pandemic hit, and is now finding her way around the community.