Playing the name game
Conventional wisdom suggests that when we name our children, we should imagine them as a Supreme Court justice or a prime minister.
But judging by the recently released list of Alberta baby names of 2012, not all parents are keen on such conventionally “safe” monikers as Beverley or Stephen.
Consequently, among Alberta’s youngest citizens we now have a Skeeter, a Precious, a Thunderbolt, a Rhaney-Day and a Shy-Angel. The etymology of Dancing-Sunflower might be a mystery to all except the little girl’s parents but Greek mythology likely sparked the imagination of those who named their son Icarus.
Ordinary Albertans giving their children extraordinary names might raise some eyebrows among those who feel more comfortable with Liam (Alberta’s No. 1 choice for boys) or Emma (No. 1 for girls) than with Beautiful or Brave. But that would ignore how readily we accept that the rich and famous, particularly in Hollywood, occasionally brand their brood with truly unconventional names. Actor Jason Lee, for example, named his son Pilot Inspector, while actress Rachel Griffiths named her son Banjo.
Daisy Boo can thank her dad, chef Jamie Oliver, for a name that might not seem so cute one day when she’s applying for a job. She still might be relatively more successful at finding employment than her brother, Buddy Bear Maurice, or her sister, Petal Blossom Rainbow. It would seem some parents think their child will be two years old forever. Maybe they just want to set their child apart from the crowd. That’s certainly what actress Shannyn Sossamon accomplished when she named her son Audio Science. And what kind of future is actor Nicolas Cage imagining for his son Kal-El, a birth name he shares with Superman?
When Shakespeare asked “what’s in a name?” he likely wasn’t thinking of Fifi-Trixibelle, Little Trixie or Honeyblossom — all children of songwriter and activist Bob Geldof.
The propensity for celebrities to affix weird labels to their offspring has grown to the point that when comedian Steve Martin announced in April he planned to name his newborn daughter Conquistador, some news outlets wondered if he was serious.
This is to say we have a fascination with names, especially ones that make us shake our heads. One has to wonder what reception awaits little Moxie CrimeFighter, daughter of illusionist Penn Jillette, as she grows into adult Moxie CrimeFighter.
To protect children against parental flights of fancy, most countries have rules on naming babies. One of the most stringent examples is Denmark, which has a list of 7,000 pre-approved names.
Our fascination with baby names is only going to intensify as speculation grows over what Prince William and Kate will name their first child, due July 13. Bookmakers are betting on Alexandra but they’ll give you 500-to-1 odds on Elvis.
Maybe there’s something to be said for shaking things up, etymologically speaking. We’re likely not ready for a King Buddy Bear but perhaps the Supreme Court could do with a Justice Thunderbolt and, considering what federal politicians have been up to lately, we might all be better off with a Prime Minister Shy-Angel.