A teachable moment for addressing racism
Halloween offers parents a chance to have discussions with their kids that build empathy, Cay Burton says.
Halloween will be different this year because of COVID-19, but it will still offer an opportunity for adults to help children confront an array of scary things. One of the scariest is racism.
Often and inadvertently, young children mimic the racism they see and hear every day. So much of the first nine years of life are about testing boundaries by trying out concepts, conversations and actions witnessed elsewhere. With the express intention of getting a reaction out of the adults, children try on ideas like Halloween costumes. That's how little kids learn.
But like costumes, children can be racist (even if they don't mean to be). A key part of ethical and responsible caregiving is teaching kids about race in accessible and actionable ways easy for them to understand and then copy. Children need to learn what anti-racism looks like by seeing their role models make it part of daily practice.
If parents and caregivers truly wish to respond to the BLM Calls to Action, then a zero-tolerance policy for racism both at home and in early learning environments ( like daycare) needs to be applied.
For white parents and early childhood educators specifically, efforts to discuss racism with children who are also white, or white-passing, should not be optional. Allyship recognizes that, because we live in a society that privileges white skin, many parents of colour are already having discussions about race and racism with their children from an early age — there's no option for these parents to be ambivalent about talking about racism with their kids.
The good news is that Halloween presents many ways to talk about racism with children.
Whose traditional territories are you trick-or-treating on? Look it up and share the names of these First Nations and Indigenous communities with your children. Let them ask questions and, if you don't know the answers, do some research together as you eat candy.
Talk about cultural appropriation. In child-friendly language, explain the antiracist rule about Halloween costumes: Don't wear something from someone else's culture.
Do not let children use face paint to change their skin colour. Not even as a “joke,” not even temporarily, not even for one night. Explain to the kids in your life that pretending to be a different race is disrespectful — hard stop — to people who look that way in real life. Teach your child that Black is beautiful, and Asian and Brown are beautiful, and that making fun of how someone looks is never funny, even on Halloween.
If children associate monstrous characters (such as vampires and witches) with Black skin, make sure to address this racialized association (that originates from the “brute caricature” of the Jim Crow era) immediately.
If you like, use the phrasing in this gentle reminder: “We have to be careful putting `evil' and dark skin together, okay? Because people with Black skin are real and they're not evil.” This reasoning is meant to appeal to the children's developing sense of empathy without shaming them for making a mistake.
Just as racism is a learned behaviour, so is anti-racism. Children need to be held accountable for the things they say and do if they're to learn in ways that inspire social change.
When we, as parents and caregivers, train ourselves to notice teachable moments when racism can be addressed, we'll realize these conversations aren't scary at all. Much scarier are the real life consequences of refusing to see these moments for what they really are, missing the opportunity to guide our children away from the tricks of racism, toward the treat of anti-racist thought and action.
Whether they're dressed as a superhero, zombie, princess or pumpkin, let's teach and empower children to be brave, instead of afraid, when it comes to fighting racism.
Just as racism is a learned behaviour, so is anti-racism.