LATE-NIGHT LAUGHS

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Late Show

Stephen Col­bert

Mat­tel has launched a gen­der neu­tral bar­bie doll, which is great news for rep­re­sen­ta­tion. but have you ever seen a bar­bie doll with­out clothes? they’re al­ready as gen­der neu­tral as it gets.

In early christ­mas news, meet the world’s first kale-flavoured candy cane. the mak­ers warn they might not have the nu­tri­tional value of ac­tual kale. So if you want none of the taste of candy and none of the nu­tri­ents of kale, this is the con­fec­tionary night­mare you’ve been wait­ing for.

Tonight Show

Jimmy Fal­lon democrats want to write up for­mal ar­ti­cles of im­peach­ment against trump by Hal­loween. and you’ll know they’re bad when trump buys a dora cos­tume and tries sneak­ing into Mex­ico.

It looks like trump could be im­peached by the hol­i­days. It’ll be weird on thanks­giv­ing when trump par­dons a turkey and then asks the turkey to par­don him back. “come on, Gi­blet! We had a deal.”

Kim­mel Live!

Jimmy Kim­mel

Less than two weeks af­ter he can­celled their camp david slum­ber party, the tal­iban is say­ing that if trump wants to talk their doors are open. Of course their doors are open: they live in caves.

the only peace don­ald trump is ever go­ing to get is a five-piece ex­tra crispy from KFC.

Late Late Show

James Cor­den a study has just come out show­ing that for most peo­ple a gluten-free diet has zero health ben­e­fits. Our thoughts and prayers are with the cit­i­zens of Los an­ge­les in this dif­fi­cult time. ac­cord­ing to the study, it costs three times as much to avoid eat­ing gluten. that’s a lot of bread for not a lot of bread.

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