Some life advice from Simon Doonan.

A post-Emily Post guide to navigating modern romance.

31% OF AMERICAN MEN BELIEVE EVERY PERSON HAS ONLY ONE TRUE LOVE, VERSUS ONLY 26% OF WOMEN.

QMiniskirts

ruled the fall runways. What message am I sending if I rock this look on a first date: high fashion or

A high maintenance? “A better question would be: What is the weather forecast? I would hate for you to catch a chill. I would also hate for your legs to get all cold and blotchy. I care.”

QWe’re

going out to dinner and barely know each other. Is there anything I can order that will be sure to impress? No one wants to be the “boring salad

A girl.” “Impressing people is very last century, darling. On a first date, you should relax and chillax and order your fave beverage. A dirty martini, right?”

Q

There are too many canons about dating older or younger men. It’s confusing, and I don’t want to seem creepy

A or cougar-like. “My mom was 10 years older than my dad. I am 14 years older than my husband, Jonathan Adler. If you find the right person, just sink your Lee Press-On Nails into his or her flesh and hope for the best.”

QI

broke up with my significant other two years ago and have had zero action since then. Any advice for

A getting back out there? “You need an accomplice, a cruising sister, a partner in crime. Call your trampiest friend and insist that she take you on a few man-chasing escapades.” ■

WE ASKED…SIMON DOONAN ANSWERED When he’s not dressing windows for Barneys New York and writing hilarious books, our favourite bon vivant is giving great advice. We asked him to offer up some romantic etiquette....

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