KIDS IN SPORTS I LIFE LESSONS
Variety of sports plus old-fashioned play give children best options, sports psychologist says
Early specialization is not recommended, Laurier prof says.
CHILDREN WHOSE recreation is a single organized sport miss important developmental opportunities to broaden their perspective and discover activities to enjoy for a lifetime, says Waterloo sports psychologist Kimberley Dawson.
As a professor of sport and exercise psychology at Wilfrid Laurier University and a trainer of several Olympic-calibre runners, Dawson is frustrated by parents’ focus on structured sport, sometimes to the detriment of family life and their own fitness.
For example, soccer tryouts were in full swing at RIM Park when Dawson, a volunteer coach, glanced over at the sidelines to see parents parked on lawn chairs, watching children run routine drills.
What struck her was that healthy adults would choose to do nothing for a couple of hours instead of walking nearby trails. “Parents are getting less fit all the time,” Dawson said in an interview. “We have to ask, ‘Why is your child’s health more important than your own?’ ” As a population, we’re seeing 20-year-olds burned out by devoting their teenage years to a single sport, yet unable to picture themselves as anything other than a hockey player, a figure skater, a swimmer.
Dawson’s husband, Lance, a registered massage therapist with Waterloo Sports Medicine, sees 10-year-olds with the type of injuries once found mainly in 30- and 40-year-olds.
The couple concur on how to raise their sons, now ages 10 and 12.
“It’s a developmental thing,” Dawson says. “Seven-year-olds want to play. Ages eight to 10 are the skill-hungry years. Kids should be learning to throw, pitch, hit tennis balls, run during those years. At 14 or 15, they can make their own decision if they want to concentrate on something.”
Q : What’s the role of a sports psychologist?
A: I work individually with swimmers and runners as a mental skills provider through the Canadian Sport Institute. I help them manage their emotions and change behaviour that’s interfering with their performance. Some athletes do 100 per cent of what they have to do naturally. For them, I can offer Part B or C for when they’re having problems. I help them gain control and confidence.
I don’t travel to competitions; if I’ve done my job, they don’t need me there.
Q : You are sporty yourself, playing soccer and running competitively. What were your parents like when you were growing up?
A: Where they faltered was almost in not caring enough, although that was one reason I was successful. They knew when to support me and when to say “live your life.” They provided social support and sometimes my dad stepped into technical support by coaching me. But we also canoed and hiked as a family. That’s the shift we’ve seen in the last 20
years. This generation of parents has lost an interest in life skills.
Q : How are you raising your children? A: With my sons, I take a multi-sport model. They play volleyball, basketball, tumbling; they skate, run, do hip hop, tennis. I want them to still be active when they’re 20, 30, 40.
I put a lot of effort into making sure they find friends. Often other kids in a neighbourhood are over-involved and not available to play. Kids will say, “I have a 6 p.m. practice so I have to rest.” We never thought about resting.
Q : What would you say to parents?
A: I ask parents to think of the consequences of their decisions. They need to be aware of what they’re socializing their kids into; kids should feel valued outside of sports. There has to be something for everyone in the family every day. One person’s schedule doesn’t supersede the family’s schedule. We need to get out the message that family is important. So is Christmas. Don’t let a tournament determine whether you’re going to be home for Christmas or not. Families are annihilated by sport. I like to see them take two steps back. I’ve been saying that for 10 years, and now we’re starting to have this dialogue.
I think parents are fatigued. You can manage if you have two kids in a specialized sport. With three or four, you can’t do it without having to farm them out to other parents. We’ve gone from encouraging kids to be independent to scheduling them every minute of the day. I think it’s because parents are afraid their kids will be left behind. I ask not “how did we get here,” but “when will we change?”
We’re indoctrinated; it will have to be another parenting cohort to change things. Today’s kids won’t spend 40 hours a week at the rink with their children.
I’m fearful that I come off as negative. I’m not. It’s just that it shouldn’t be either/or — either you’re in it or out of it.
I say to parents, “Find out what your philosophy is and stick to it.” Mine is lifetime physical activity. We’re fortunate that my husband and I both have lots of energy because we play with our kids, two on two, basketball, soccer, hockey.
Q : And what do you tell the parents of tomorrow? A: I teach a class on children’s activities and I tell my students to ask themselves: “Does this work for everyone?”
The students taking that class were once the kids who were running around on the playground with red ribbons. But very few are playing sports or doing things to stay active by the time they’re 20. University is where it all changes.
I have a grad student looking at adventure running for kids. We need to send kids outside. There are mental health benefits just from being outdoors, from taking a walk in the woods. Structured sports shouldn’t be all your child does.
I heard a grad student in Ottawa compare organized hockey to a cult. It becomes a way of life for the parents, too.
Q : What’s the prescription for change? A: More isn’t better. Recreational sports have adopted competitive schedules. In the same way, recreational runners think more is better and it’s not. Competitive runners don’t run multiple marathons in a year; they know it’s high-quality training, not time, that makes the difference.
We need more skills development and fewer games, but parents don’t like that because it’s boring to watch kids do the same thing over and over. The kids have no say. They just finish one tournament and are signed up for the next one.
Sports has the potential to make great citizens, but that includes social literacy.
Q : How do you define social literacy? A: Parents are responsible for teaching many skills to their children: social development, academic growth and emotional growth toward independence. It’s a priority for parents to provide opportunities for their kids to learn how to interact positively with others.
I think there needs to be more of an emphasis on children being exposed to a variety of motor environments so that they can develop physical literacy as well. Developing physical literacy means that kids are capable of learning and performing a variety of motor skills such as swimming, throwing, kicking, jumping, riding a bike, and not just learning how to be proficient in one sport.
I would like physical literacy to be just as much a priority for parents as reading skills and social skills.
Q : You often refer to family life taking a hit if rink time takes precedence.
A: If sports are affecting the family environment, it’s a problem.
Look at the physical activity guidelines for kids: they call for 60 minutes a day of activities to benefit muscles, flexibility, cardio. If more parents thought about what their child actually gets out of their current routine, they might change it.
There are gender differences. Males push for competitive organized sports more; women are trying to have more balance at home. We’ll see if that changes when we have more high-performance women.
If we get this process right, we’ll get the outcomes we want. We’re not getting more fit, not winning more medals or more (athletic) scholarships with what we’re doing now.