When your security is threatened by someone, protect yourself

I live in a small low-rent basement of a house, where I moved when my daughter moved out of our home six years ago. My landlord lives elsewhere and has other renters.

I can’t work due to a disability. I’ve had break-ins and stuff has been stolen from my apartment and vehicle, I think by friends of my boyfriend, who’s half my age.

We’ve been dating off and on for four years. He used to rent upstairs. He went to jail, having been in the “wrong place wrong time” - but was since released on terms.

He asked to stay in my apartment. My landlord agreed but only for a short time.

The couple upstairs complained that my guy was having a lot of guests in my place when I’m not home, and there’s been drug use. The landlord asked me to get him out. He started saying he loves me, but I’m not interested in a serious relationship.

His friends who keep popping in are all in their 20s and have troubled lives. The romance and sex we used to have has stopped. He sleeps on the couch, is lazy and messy. His addictions are worse than I knew.

All the turmoil here has caused me grief. My landlord’s threatened to evict me if it keeps up. I don’t want to involve police if possible. He refuses to leave and I feel may cause more problems!

– Too Much Trouble

He’s no “boyfriend” to you.

He’s using you and doesn’t care that he’s risking your home and security. You may need to involve police.

Ask your landlord to be present when you insist that this guy leaves. But, if he can’t attend, ask him to write a notice that he wants him out and send it to you to hand over.

Otherwise, if your daughter or anyone else (e.g. a neighbour) can be available, have them there.

However, if you fear his reaction, call the police.

He’s making his own bad choices. Protect yourself.