Emma needs help friends can’t give her
Dear Annie:
I am a teenager in high school with two close friends, “Emma” and “Vienna.” Emma was recently diagnosed with OCD and bipolar disorder. There have been many conflicts. Emma is now really sensitive, and if Vienna or I say anything even mildly offensive, she gets super-angry.
This past summer, we all worked at a local kids’ camp. When one of the instructors joked around, Emma took it seriously and became upset. She then talked with the instructor and his boss. All I know is that it didn’t end well, and Emma quit.
I will often get a call from Emma saying she is lonely. I try to comfort her by keeping her company.
I have just started a new high school. Emma insists that I will ditch them for new friends. Vienna and I know we can’t begin to understand what it’s like to have both OCD and bipolar disorder, but we can’t live like this.
— A Worried Friend
Dear Friend:
Those with bipolar disorder often have periods of depression.
If Emma also has OCD, she may become fixated on certain negative thoughts. There is only so much you can do to combat Emma’s innate doubts.
Please try to be patient with her, but understand that not all friendships survive high school.
Dear Annie:
I work in a small office. One person douses herself in perfume. It makes my eyes water and my nose run, and sometimes I have sneezing fits.
No one will bring it up to her face, although I have casually mentioned it to her in conversation a few times.
Why don’t people understand that the workplace is not the place to overdo the strong scents?
Years ago, my doctor told me he had a patient who was so sensitive to scents that she had an allergic attack and died — right in the hospital. My doctor now makes his employees sign a letter of agreement not to wear any type of cologne or perfume to work.
Please tell these people that although they may believe they smell great, they actually reek.
— Suffocating in Louisville
Dear Suffocating:
Some folks have a diminished sense of smell and do not realize how strong their perfume is. A drop is sufficient.
And with so many folks suffering from allergies these days, one really must be careful.
If you have supervisors or a human resources department, please ask whether a notice can go out suggesting that employees not wear perfumes.
Otherwise, approach your coworker and say, “I’m sure you don’t realize how overpowering your cologne is. I have terrible allergies and am very sensitive. Could you please not wear it at the office?”