This is the golden age of late-night TV
Have so many made us laugh so hard while skewering so many celebrities
In the old days, Lance Armstrong may have only had to face the late-night TV wrath/skewering of Johnny Carson. Oh, how Lance might be now wishing for those days.
In the late-night TV universe of the present, Lance has had to go through the gauntlet for his trespasses.
“We all owe cancer an apology,” Jon Stewart announced on the Daily Show. “I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that Lance was now banging David Petraeus (the former U.S. general embroiled in controversy over an extramarital affair).”
“He beat cancer. Then he went on to beat something less popular, the French,” Stephen Colbert blurted on his Colbert Report.
“Lance Armstrong has just confessed that he’s a lesbian,” David Letterman said, before listing his Top 10 list of other Armstrong revelations. Number 1 was: “He only admitted to doping to get on Oprah.”
“Oprah never would have had the stamina for a twoand-a-half-hour interview if Lance hadn’t given her something to keep it going,” Conan O’Brien opined.
“We learned he only caved in when Oprah promised him a panini-maker, ”Jimmy Kimmel mused. “But seriously, I think it took a lot of ball for Lance to admit to cheating.”
It is a jungle out there for those who run afoul of the law and/or the pundits. TV’s late night is now populated by human vultures hanging in the trees, ready to swoop down on those no longer in favour.
It all makes for some hysterical viewing. It also requires a couple of DVRs to keep tabs. Who to watch? Letterman, Leno, Stewart, Colbert, Conan, Jimmy Fallon, Craig Ferguson or the new kid on the 11:35 p.m. block, Jimmy Kimmel?
OK, I think I can help. Eliminate the ever-puffed up Leno, who has exceeded his shelf life but who still won’t give it up. NBC just extended his Tonight Show contract beyond its expiration date of 2014 — to the dismay, no doubt, of Fallon who, like Conan before him, has been waiting for the day Leno leaves.
Beyond Leno, though, the other six hosts have been on fire of late. Competition, coupled with fallen idols, brings out the best in comedy. So much so that it appears we have entered a Golden Age of sorts for late-night TV hijinks.
Take the ever-patient Fallon, the former Saturday Night Live trouper who took over NBC’s Late Night slot at weeknights at 12:35 a.m. in 2009, when the impatient Conan left — after Leno refused to go gently into that good night and disappear.
It’s taken a couple of years, but Fallon has gained confidence and has been delivering. Operating under pretty much the same format as the others — save Stewart and Colbert — with an opening monologue, a sidekick, goofy stunts, a celeb guest and a musical and/or comedy act, Fallon has managed to bring his superior stand-up skills to the forefront again.
Earlier this week, Fallon talked about attending the Golden Globes in L.A., where he presented an award with Leno. “Jay then drove me to the airport right after the show and made sure I got on that plane (to New York). He held on to my hand so tight that it hurt, and he waited for the plane to take off,” he quipped in reference to Leno’s perceived paranoia about Fallon replacing him.
Fallon also explained why Les Misérables was the perfect choice for the Globe for best musical or comedy: “It was part musical with Anne Hathaway singing and part comedy with Russell Crowe singing.”
Whereas Leno will sit and gawk at Jessica Simpson — who was coming out of her dress as much as Jay was coming out of his chin this week — Fallon actually en- gages guests like Uma Thurman. And his stunts, while goofy, are brought to another level — certainly from those of Leno. Particularly Fallon’s karate piñata event, wherein blind-folded contestants must kick the piñata likenesses of Abe Lincoln and Al Roker to smithereens to win a lifetime supply of tacos.
It won’t be long before NBC comes to its senses and has Fallon competing with Letterman and Kimmel for the funny bones of late-night audiences.
Kimmel, too, has successfully graduated to the 11:35 p.m. weeknight bigs after nearly 10 years of grooming his Jimmy Kimmel Live! later in the night on ABC. While he doesn’t have the stand-up skills of a Fallon, he brings a certain twisted quality to the tube. Be it with his video parodies of Matt Damon or montages of wiseass kids trying to pick up older women. He also has one of the best sidekicks in the biz, the rotund, evergiggling Guillermo, who is up for anything from undergoing a prostate exam on air — administered by both Kimmel and Dr. Oz — to starring in a video spoof of Damon’s The Bourne Ultimatum. But Kimmel isn’t entirely heartless. Dr. Oz did a sonogram on air this week, which proved beyond a doubt that Kimmel has a large heart.
And what about Kimmel’s Lie Witness News segments, wherein reporters take to the street to ask folks their thoughts on Eddie Murphy getting an Oscar nom for his role in Ninja Knights 3: The Reckoning. The people all think the honour is well deserved and marvel how they enjoyed the flick — despite the fact that there is no such film with Murphy. High-larious!
Meanwhile, Letterman reigns as the king of late night after 30 years behind the desk.
The one-time weatherman can be curmudgeonly and is certainly eccentric with his open double-breasted suits and his white socks, but he still has the goods and is invariably the first interview choice for A-list actors, musicians, comics and politicos on his CBS Late Show, weeknights at 11:35 p.m. His manner is ever casual, often caustic, accounting for a monologue with plenty of bite: “President Obama’s half-brother is running for governor in Kenya, but his opponents claim he was born in Hawaii.”
Letterman also strays way off-script in his candid celeb interviews — a refreshing departure from the gushing Leno. He gets actors like quirky Silver Linings Playbook star Jennifer Lawrence or Zero Dark Thirty’s Jessica Chastain — both Golden Globe winners — to say the darndest things on air, rather than allow them to relentlessly plug their latest projects.
Ferguson, following Letterman at 12:35 a.m., has also grown comfortably into his hosting role.
Ever amiable, he, too, can turn the knife when provoked. The Scottish accent helps endear him to audiences, but Ferguson, a former stand-up who went by the name Bing Hitler, shows excellent timing with his repartees: “A woman in Spain was arrested for stashing three pounds of cocaine in her breast implants. I thought: ‘That’s quite a bust.’ ”
Conan may still be bristling about not getting Leno’s gig on the Tonight Show, but it has at least allowed him to retain his edge and wacky ways. His show is carried weeknights by TBS in the U.S. and CTV at 1:35 a.m. here.
The for mer Simpsons writer is also as unpredictable as ever, and no one is safe from his sabre: “It has been so cold in L.A. that Lindsay Lohan crashed her car into a blanket store.” Or, “Walmart announced it was going to hire 100,000 veterans. Yeah, Walmart is going to invade Costco.”
Without question, however, the arrival of the Daily Show with Jon Stewart and the Colbert Report — car- ried by Comedy Central in the U.S. and CTV at, respectively, 12:05 a.m. and 12:35 a.m. weeknights — has forced all the other late-night players to up their games. Both Stewart and Colbert benefit from the sharpest and funniest comedy writers in the business. Whether it’s Stewart with its fake news and verbal assaults on politicos and celebs and disgraced cyclists or Colbert as the faux right-wing zealot who makes a mockery of the former, neither takes any prisoners.
Next to Bill Maher — back again Fridays at 10 p.m. on HBO Canada — and Lewis Black, a regular on his Daily Show, Stewart is the most political and delightfully nasty of all the late-nighters. He takes the velvet hammer approach with his barbs, such as his recent take on taciturn U.S. Supreme Court Judge Clarence Thomas with “The Silence of the Clarence.” Small wonder, more young people turn to the Daily Show for their news than to mainstream telecasts.
Colbert comes f rom another planet altogether. In addition to posing as a patriot, Colbert manages to find news items that have evaded all the others. Such as the “monkey on the lam,” which resulted in “1,381 days of simian terror in Tampa.” True, too. Or the CataCoffin, equipped with a customized sound system for the departed six feet under. Family and friends can even control the playlist. Also true. If you don’t like the person, you can program it with Nickelback, Colbert suggested. Or for those who choose to be cremated, Colbert had a really novel idea: the iUrn for those “ready to rock their ash off.”
Keep it coming, Stephen. The rest of you, too. It actually makes insomnia something to welcome.