A life saved, a friendship born
Cancer survivor, bone marrow donor now like family
Before Kevin Zempko’s wedding began at a boutique San Diego Hotel, the bartender asked Calgarian Dianne Mahura how she knew the groom. She told him to wait and see. Mahura was soon standing in front of Zempko and bride Erica Wacker’s 138 wedding guests to officiate their wedding.
There was hardly a dry eye in the room as Mahura told guests that Zempko was her “10- outof- 10” bone marrow match. And that Zempko had found a “10- outof- 10” match in his beautiful bride.
Six years ago, Mahura and Zempko were strangers — one a bubbly and giving Canadian mom, the other an ex- marine who lived in San Diego and loved to run.
Today, they are close friends brought together by a life- saving bone marrow donation.
Zempko and Mahura’s friendship has grown since the two first met in 2009. Both admit their bond is difficult to label or easily explain.
“He’s l i ke my angel,” said 51- year- old Mahura.
Zempko, who is 39, said Mahura is a part of his family.
“She’s not terribly older than me, but I absolutely look at her almost like a mother figure,” he said.
In September 2007, Mahura, a 44- year- old mom of three, found she had leukemia and was told by doctors that without a stem cell transplant she would probably die.
In an instant, Mahura’s days of shuttling her teenage boys to football practice, volunteering at her children’s school and working part time at a scrapbooking store were over.
Her luxurious home was replaced with a decorated hospital room that her friends, husband and boys visited daily as she underwent aggressive chemotherapy.
“I fought because I had three wonderful children and a husband that I wasn’t going to leave,” Mahura said.
When doctors discovered Mahura’s four siblings were not a match for the needed bone marrow transplant, they turned to a national registry.
Nearly 3,000 kilometres away, fitness nut Zempko was about to go for a run when he received a phone call from a registry stating his stem cells may be needed.
“I said I’ll help whoever this person is in need,” Zempko recalled.
It had been more than a year since the ex- marine had spent 15 minutes signing up for the bone marrow registry, inspired to join by a fellow marine who lost his eight- year- old son to leukemia.
Mahura had completed her chemotherapy in Calgary when Zempko’s stem cells arrived in a small plastic bag.
The only thing Mahura was told about the stem cells was that they came from a 32- year- old man, who she imagined was “a handsome stud from Italy.”
For his part, Zempko only knew his donation was going to a 44- year- old woman.
Hospital policy keeps donors anonymous for one year after treatment — in part, said Mahura, because many recipients don’t survive the first year. After 12 months have passed, if both the donor and recipient agree, email addresses and phone numbers are shared.
As Mahura recovered from surgery and worked to gain strength and reclaim her old l ife, she thought about her donor “every single day.” Even during difficult times, she would drag herself out of bed to write on a blog that had become a regular source of updates and inspiration for friends and family.
“I wrote all the time about my stem cell donor and what an amazing man he must be,” she said.
Meanwhile, Zempko also spent countless hours thinking about the woman who received his stem cells, especially during the long hours when he was training for marathons.
“For one year straight as I was doing these different ( running ) events, I would imagine whoever was receiving my stem cells and think about how it helped them,” he said.
About a month after the oneyear anniversary of her transplant, a healthy Mahura sent Zempko an email.
“The first paragraph said, ‘ It was not just me you saved, but a marriage of 17 years, three boys now have a mother.’ I couldn’t even read anymore. I was absolutely in tears. You don’t understand the magnitude. You just know you’re doing a kind act, a good act.”
Mahura said writing the email was difficult but important.
“I needed him to know that I was a huge part of a community and I was a person that was wellloved and had kids. It was really important for me to tell him that he donated to a good cause.”
Within weeks, Mahura travelled to San Diego to watch Zempko run a leukemia marathon in her honour in May 2009.
Over the years, the relationship has grown beyond sickness and stem cells.
“When we get together, it’s not about cancer anymore. It’s just about us inspiring each other and having each other in our lives,” Mahura said.
When Zempko started dating Wacker, it was important to him that his stem cell recipient meet her.
“He knew she was the one, but he really wanted to bring her to meet me,” Mahura said.
Zempko and Wacker came to Calgary during the summer of 2013. While enjoying the Stampede and mountains, Wacker and Mahura hit it off.
“As soon as I met her, I knew that she was the perfect match,” Mahura said.
Zempko said both he and his bride- to- be felt the woman who received his bone marrow was “the obvious” choice when it came time to decide who would marry them.
“It really made me realize what an impact I’ve made on his life and how important I was to him,” said Mahura, who became ordained via a quick online course.
I needed him to know that I ... was a person that was wellloved and had kids. It was really important for me to tell him that he donated to a good cause.