An evening at an auction is a good night out, even for ex- mayors
It’s not just the bargains to be had — and there are plenty — it’s a lot of fun
The distressed green leather sofa has to go. It was bought 15 years ago to last 50. At the time, I was so impressed I thought it might be mentioned in my will. But now, even the old school blanket isn’t large enough to cover its indecency. It is in tatters, like an animal with mange. And it is sinking into the floor, and me with it. This sinking couch is becoming a Titanic experience.
Canadians deserve better, I find myself protesting.
Luckily, there are generous and kind people in our community who are downsizing, lots of them. And they have furniture to give away. And I found one. Recently I found myself sitting next to another former West Island mayor of similar vintage, but this one endowed with the magnetic powers of an old television personality. You always feel important when you are with Bill McMurchie, as if you were on television. His mother- in- law has recently moved into one of our higher- end senior facilities leaving behind a spacious apartment full of fine furniture.
Now ex- mayors form a sort of mutual- aid club based on the huge number of futile and frustrating meetings we all attended together. I imagine jail time creates a similar camaraderie. We really did spend way too much time together getting almost nowhere slowly. Every time I look at McMurchie, who at a recent Train de l’Ouest press conference appeared to have lost 10 years off his age since he retired from Pointe- Claire city hall, I am reminded of the furrowed brow and steely look sitting next to me at the Montreal Agglomeration who rejected the $ 355 million water meter contract that later brought Gérald Tremblay to his knees.
When McMurchie talked about water, all the demerged mayors listened. He had Pointe- Claire’s giant filtration plant to his credit.
It was no wonder then when our TV celebrity ex- mayor and his charming wife offered us her mother’s almost new couch as a solution to our green leather disaster, I pounced on the offer. The next day I went down to Côte St- Luc with the celebrity mayor to admire mother’s old apartment and manhandle her new couch back to the West Island.
That would have been the end of it except that I was now developing a taste for large lounging furniture and had already decided to go to Empire Auctions on Paré Street just off the northern end of the Décarie Expressway to see what an auction looks like. You can preview Empire Auctions online and browse through the items coming up at their monthly sales. Descriptions are brief and there’s an estimate of value. The range spreads from $ 50 for an antique hairbrush to $ 25,000 for a John Little painting of a Montreal street.
A chaise longue had caught my eye, mainly because it looked like a long, wide surface that would be at just the right height for televised sporting events. Its half back would also act as a disincentive to visitors looking for a seat. This is not as sociable as the new sofa.
You can get to the auction house by taking the first exit going south on the Décarie. Turn right on Paré Street and there’s lots of parking. If you want to make a bid, you have to sign in at the door on the right and get yourself a number. Don’t wave it around unless you are bidding. Don’t use it as a fan. I was a bit late for the night of the chaise longue, but the auctioneer, Abe Rogo, hadn’t started. His wife, Barbara, told me that they’ve been doing these auctions since 1973, when he started with coins and stamps. Now, they auction anything and everything. They work together with their sons, in Montreal and Toronto.
The auction was selling off furniture and jewelry, carpets and paintings from the breakup of an estate. Rogo is a most entertaining auctioneer and it’s worth the two or three hours to listen to his patter. It’s a mix of Groucho Marx and an old history professor at university. And it’s free!
This must be how vultures feel picking over corpses. Looking at what other people filled their houses with. And how big must those houses be! Two sevenfoot carved tusks. Where would you put them? And treasured jewelry worth thousands of dollars. It’s even more exciting than Behind the Scenes at Downton Abbey.
If you want a winter night out at the auction, then check at www.empireauctions.com. And, by the way, I ended up buying two chaises longues and a Moroccan carpet. Where am I going to put them?