DOWNSIZE DILEMMA
It can be difficult letting go of the past, but the results can mean a less cluttered future
If you had asked John Weis last year whether he and his wife were going to move out of their Vienna, Va., house, “I’d have says absolutely not,” he says.
But Weis started thinking about the fact that he’s 72 and that at some point, the couple would want to switch to one-storey living, and that they did not want to burden their kids with the big old house and sorting through all the belongings they had amassed over the years.
These realizations pressed Weis into action. In December, he and his wife bought a one-storey, 1,762-square-foot house to be constructed in the summer.
In mid-February, they moved to a small, two-bedroom rental apartment they are occupying while their new home is built, and they began readying the old house for sale. That meant contending with all of the belongings inside.
This transitional period — when shifting from a large home to a smaller one, or moving to a new house or managing the contents of a home while it’s being remodelled — is notoriously daunting.
Most homeowners accumulate more and more belongings, often not realizing how much they have. They delay going through everything until they have to, and then, under pressure to get it done, might keep or toss too much instead of making focused decisions.
“The average person is like a deer in the headlights” when considering the prospect of sorting and dealing with belongings, says Aida Middel, co-owner of Potomac Concierge.
Middel and other home organizers say the process works best when a friend or professional is there to motivate and help. Cheryl Larson of Cheryl’s Organizing Concepts agrees. If homeowners are paying a professional to help, they are likely to “take the project seriously” and get the job done efficiently, she says.
The hardest step is often the first one. For Weis, that meant beginning to chip away at the mountain of stuff, including items handed down from relatives, things acquired by four sons when growing up and curiosities and souvenirs from extensive travel. “The basement was filled to the brim. The pool table was stacked high,” Weis says. The two-car garage housed “every tool known to man.”
Weis needed someone to take charge and guide him. Enter Maria White, whose company, Enuff with the Stuff, provides personal organizing and moving help. Weis’s project was “multilayered,” she says, encompassing a general purge of excess belongings; the temporary move to a small, storage-deficient apartment; separate storage of possessions while the Weises lived in the apartment — including some things likely to be used during that time; and a second move to the new house when construction was complete.
White started the weeding-out process by tackling the old house’s storage areas where many things had sat unused for a long time. Item by item, she helped Weis decide what not to keep; what to do with those things; what “keepers” to place in storage when moving out; and what to take to the apartment.
It’s important for helpers to understand the homeowner’s feelings and decision-making style and pace, and to guide the homeowner accordingly during the purging process. Homeowners often have emotional ties to things, Larson says. “People need time if a spouse or parent dies,” for example, she says. “We do our best at such times to (encourage parting with things to) eliminate the need for storage, but we don’t push.”
Over the course of numerous sorting sessions, White and Weis worked through the process at his house. Weis says White used questions to help him. She would ask whether he wanted to hold onto an item. “I want to keep that,” he says. She then would ask nicely, “How are you going to use this in your new house?” Such questions eased the way for Weis to let go of things. White says she often “acknowledged along the way how hard it is,” to let Weis know that she understood.
Before disposing of things, many homeowners tell their children to take what they want. Kinkead says it’s wise to “touch base with the kids” regarding their mementos from childhood. This also saves the expense of moving and perhaps storing items pending a decision. And disposing of truly unwanted things is doing the kids a favour; as Larson says, “Get rid of it now so your kids don’t have to.”
When considering whether to sell, donate or throw away things, homeowners often assume something is worth more than it is. “They know what they paid for it,” Larson says, but that might have little bearing on demand for it now. Checking online resale sites can provide an idea of what buyers are willing to pay. Rather than selling things for the low price they might command, Kinkead says it might be better to donate them.
“Re-homing ” some items, however, might benefit from the insights of a pro. Blumberg was ready to give away a lot of costume jewelry, for example. Instead, Potomac Concierge knew it had value and sold it for him at a good price.
White tries to match donated items to recipients who can make best use of them. She gave Weis’s large accumulation of office supplies to area schools for use in classrooms. Personal-care items and some non-perishable foods went to low-income senior housing centres. A safety centre accepted medications for destruction. Furniture and other household items can be donated to organizations that make such things available to people in need. White says that when homeowners know something is “going to someone who will re-love it all over again, they are happy to let it go.”
After he decided what to keep, donate, sell or throw away, a junk removal company took away what was left that could not be put out with the trash. The key to successful transitioning of homes and belongings is planning. Use a simple floor plan of the new home, with dimensions noted, to determine what furniture will fit.
Label the contents of all boxes to be moved. To keep tabs on things and guide the moving company, White used colour coding for Weis’s boxes: She put yellow stickers on boxes to go to the apartment and blue ones on those to go to storage. Make the labelling specific enough to be helpful. Identify contents as, for instance, pots and pans, rather than simply “kitchen.”
If using a self-storage unit, “be strategic,” White says. Set up shelving to keep things organized. Put items that are less needed in the back. Up front, place things more in demand, keep the labels visible and don’t stack too many boxes on top of one another. Security Public Storage, a self-storage company, recommends using large boxes for lightweight items and smaller boxes for heavy things, such as books. The company also suggests storing belongings inside refrigerators and other large items.
Weis rented a 10- to 12-foot selfstorage unit not far from his apartment. “We make trips to it almost daily to take things in and out,” he says.
It’s important for helpers to understand the homeowner’s feelings and decisionmaking style and pace, and to guide the homeowner.