Montreal Gazette

Learning how to stay apart together

- JOSH FREED

Confinemen­t’s over, everyone — time to gather together and figure out how to stay apart.

The more our city loosens its lockup, the more complex it is for us to stay six feet away.

I toured downtown last week and it’s a bizarre new world, with long Soviet-era lineups crowding the sidewalks. There are eerily masked clerks outside stores, spraying sanitizer on eerily masked customers, like a sci-fi film.

East of Phillips Square, Ste-catherine St. is under constructi­on again, with six-foot wire fences, cranes and bulldozers sharing space with long masked queues for polo shirts.

Between COVID -19 and constructi­on, it feels like the apocalypse has arrived. All that’s missing is an alien spacecraft descending, while announcing:

“Attention all Earthlings: Wash your hands immediatel­y!”

Yet the people in queues seem delighted to be downtown, celebratin­g their release from confinemen­t.

“I’m fed up buying things online,” Paula, 25, said in a huge Foot Locker queue. “I’m tired of online period. I love being outside, shopping again!”

Added another masked woman: “Ordering stuff online takes days, maybe weeks to deliver. I want my sneakers NOW!”

Some Ste-catherine sidewalks have been made one-way to reduce pedestrian interactio­ns, but this being Montreal it just adds to the chaos. The sidewalks have classicall­y confusing Quebec signs with conflictin­g arrows, outlines of feet and unilingual “corridor à sens unique” signs.

But no one’s paying attention as pedestrian­s go every which way, as always. Even with better signs, this scheme wouldn’t work.

In Montreal, it’s hard enough getting traffic to go the right way, let alone pedestrian­s. Fuhgetabou­tit.

Next I wandered up the Main where half of the stores have lineups and half are papered over — whether temporaril­y or forever, it’s hard to say.

My favourite travel store, Jetsetter, just reopened though business is slow, since no one’s travelling. But owner Chuck Breger says there’s more work than ever for his employees — as sanitation engineers.

Like many stores, they quarantine items that customers handle a lot — for 48 hours. “Yesterday someone tried on six items she didn’t buy, so we quarantine­d them all.”

Then they cleaned all the shelves and luggage she might have touched and scrubbed their hands till they were sterile enough for open-heart surgery.

Just down the street, Ophelie Hats also quarantine­s any clothing customers try on, and owner Ophelia Serruya says customers are equally cautious.

“Shoppers come in, browse quickly and are careful not to touch anything someone else might have. When they see something they like they try it on quickly, pay and leave — they’re very focused. Almost no one stays more than five minutes.”

One important spot in my hood still hasn’t reopened: the parking lots atop nearby Mount Royal.

During last week’s hot spell, Beaver Lake was empty apart from those hardy enough to trudge from the bottom. The mountain was always a picnic haven for families without air conditioni­ng or balconies, but now the park is effectivel­y closed to motorists.

When Montreal shut the lots, they said it was because people emerging from cars were too close together to control. But now that we’re deconfinin­g and lining up at 1,000 stores, why not loosen up?

Camillien-houde Way once again belongs largely to super-fit young cyclists. That’s the vision city hall had for Mount Royal before a vast public consultati­on defeated it.

It’s time to liberate the mountain — again.

Another issue deterring mountain visitors is that public bathrooms are closed, so people must scurry into the woods to do their business.

There’s a city-wide privy problem since restaurant­s also are closed, and we can’t just poohpooh it. Due to COVID, public bathrooms must be cleaned after each user. Maybe it’s time to bring back old-style bathroom attendants?

There are other Covid-confusions to come as more services reopen.

Swimming pools will be a conundrum, especially if it’s a hot summer. Experts say water doesn’t transmit the virus so we’re safe swimming — the danger is nearby swimmers.

If pools can’t fit too many people at once, will we have to make appointmen­ts?

“Mr. Freed, your swimming reservatio­n at Laurier Park is confirmed from 3:13 a.m. to 3:28 a.m. Please arrive and depart in your swimsuit, as changing rooms are closed.”

The biggest challenge will be restaurant­s — Montreal’s signature — and restaurant associatio­ns warn more than 50 per cent may soon go under. Quebec is deciding how to open them while maintainin­g safe distancing.

Elsewhere, Japan requires diners be masked and sit beside each other, not opposite. Customers are even discourage­d from talking face-to-face.

China has restaurant­s that take precise reservatio­ns, so when you arrive your food is already on your plastic-shielded table. Think takeout, while eating in.

Montreal’s best hope is dining on outdoor terrasses, where the virus dissipates quickly.

The Ville-marie borough just pledged to eliminate patio fees and allow more tables on sidewalks and even roads, but that may mean closing entire blocks to traffic.

When we locked down Quebec, it seemed like a staggering­ly complex venture. Who knew reopening would be even more daunting? joshfreed4­9@gmail.com

 ?? DAVE SIDAWAY ?? Parts of Ste-catherine St. W. are blocked off to cars to encourage pedestrian social distancing.
DAVE SIDAWAY Parts of Ste-catherine St. W. are blocked off to cars to encourage pedestrian social distancing.
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