Bulletin Board
A text came through from my sister one afternoon. It read, “Why does a bird have feathers?” I politely responded, “You’re telling it wrong.” I could sense the confusion in her follow-up texts. And, as any loving brother would do, I explained that there’s a reason they call them “dad” jokes— there’s an art to it. If you mess up even one word in the delivery, the whole joke is ruined. This was meant to be a joke about ducks, not birds. She should have asked, “Why does a duck have feathers?” Dad jokes are based on a simple concept, coupled with a deadpan delivery, usually resulting in a “punny” conclusion. “Did you hear about the guy that invented Lifesavers? They say he made a mint.” Every dad tells them. Every mom moans when they hear them. And every kid face-palms and rolls their eyes. But dads laugh, every time! So simple. So innocent. So sorely missed. You see, I lost my dad recently. And although there are many things I miss about him—his infectious smile, warm embrace with the slight scent of Old Spice, watching baseball and talking hockey—i also miss his dad jokes. A three-legged dog walks into a bar and says, “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw.” A classic that Dad told far too often.
As a father of four myself now, I still looked forward to seeing Dad and hearing his latest joke. Every time I hear a new joke, or tell one to my kids, I think of Dad. Sharing this tradition with my kids is the best way to keep Papa in their hearts. With every joke, I still picture his smile and see the joy on his face from a successful joke delivery. He may not have elicited many laughs, aside from himself, but he left an impression on everyone who heard him. “You’ll never guess what I saw today?” he would say. “A squirrel puking—it was nuts!”
So the next time you have the opportunity to hear one of your dad’s corny old jokes, soak it in. Embrace the moment. Trust me, your dad is enjoying his time in the limelight. He’s no doubt practiced the delivery and punchline many times alone before sharing it with an audience. “So, why does a duck have feathers? It’s so you don’t see its butt quack.” Bob Picken, London, Ont.