Funny Stuff
One day I announced to my dear husband that I wanted to go on a hot-air balloon ride. “I’ve always wanted to try it, Fred,” I said. “Let’s sign up for some fun!”
Fred looked a bit startled, but then he smiled. “I wouldn’t mind riding in one myself,” he said.
The next Sunday, we went to the park where a fellow was busy pumping up a huge balloon. Many people were watching, while others were helping. A busy time!
“Where do we sign up for a ride?” I asked. The manager looked dubious when Fred limped up beside me, “Is that your first gear?” the manager asked Fred. “Can you run?”
“Not anymore,” Fred admitted. “Sorry, but I can’t take you up,” he said kindly. “You must be fully fit in case something happens.”
Fred looked disappointed and I felt sorry. “Oh never mind, Fred,” I said. “We’ll just go back home.”
“But you can go on the ride,” Fred insisted. “I’ll just wait in the car.”
“Oh Fred,” I gushed, “I’ve always wanted to try this!
Thank you so much.” I kissed his cheeks before helping him climb into the car. “After I take off you should park in the shade, so you’ll be comfortable!”
“Don’t worry about me,” Fred replied generously. “Just have some fun!” And off I went to pay my fare. I scurried over to the partially filled balloon and stood in line, watching as it gradually swelled fully with air.
“Now, don’t get in until the basket lifts off the ground,” the manager announced. “Wait in your spot around the edge until the basket rises at least a foot, and then climb in,” he explained.
We stood at rapt attention as the basket ropes tightened, and the basket began to shake. All at once it cleared the ground and started skyward. I quickly grasped the basket and hung on.
In no time we had cleared the trees and were airborne. I was clinging to the side of the basket, sticking my fingers into the woven spindles to keep a grip. We were decidedly airborne, and I realized I had better climb in. But how? I needed help.
Everyone was in the basket, talking, laughing and screaming. I began to call out, “Help, Help!” No one heard me, so I revved it up a notch and screamed louder. Still no one answered, they were having too much fun. We were now sailing over the cable wires and I began to screech: “HELP, HELP, PLEASE HELP ME ln!
“My God,” cried a man as he peered over the edge. “There’s an old lady hanging on the outside of our basket. Help me drag her in!”
With much cursing, scraping and praying (that was me), I managed to throw one leg over the rim and tumble onto the floor of the basket. Undignified, to say the least. I lay there until I got my wind, stood up and did my best to enjoy the ride now that I was actually aboard. We landed with no trouble and a mini-bus drove us back to the waiting group. Still shaking, I wondered what Fred would have to say.
“Let’s get out of here. I’m hungry,” he growled. I was more than happy to oblige. We never discussed my misadventure and I shudder every time I think of it!