Sticky fingers

Dear Ms. Smart, When I have people to dinner, I put out fresh soap and place fresh guest towels on a small table in the bathroom, separate from the family’s things. I also make sure there’s an extra roll of toilet paper available. But often when I go to other people’s homes, I note to my dismay that I’m expected to dry my hands on what look suspiciously like the same towels used by family members. The bathroom seems to be the one room of the house that hasn’t been prepared for guests.

Am I uptight? What should you expect when you enter a bathroom in someone else’s home? Cleaning Agent Dear Cleaning Agent, And people wonder why they get colds and flu! Cleaning bathroom countertops and taps with household disinfectant and setting out fresh guest towels when company is coming is part and parcel of maintaining a decent standard of living in one’s home environment. It makes no sense to recontaminate your hands just after you’ve washed them — some viruses can live on cloth towels for hours.

To be fair, many hosts find that their guests will not use the designated guest towels ( what do they do?), so they stop putting them out. A friend of mine resorted to leaving paper towelling, individually folded and stacked neatly by the sink in the bathroom ( it’s extremely hygienic).

Discreetly preview any strange bathrooms you encounter. If you don’t see a small fresh towel of some description in evidence, nip over to the kitchen for a paper towel or some tissues before entering. It’s a good idea to carry packaged hand wipes in your pocket or hand bag. Dear Ms. Smart, I have a friend who licks and sucks every finger on both hands as she works her way through a meal — even at a restaurant. In a professional setting she controls herself but in a social situation she licks away with gusto, and I find it disgusting. May I add that she often laments the fact that she never gets a third date? She’s extremely clever and has a fabulous job, but her table manners “suck.” I'd like to point this out to her but don’t know how.

Finger Lickin’ Bad Dear Finger Lickin’ Bad, The finger-licking habit is excruciatingly painful to witness. Unfortunately, the perpetrators rarely notice that their dining companions are embarrassed on their behalf, not to mention nauseated.

I suggest you work around the problem by playing the hygiene card. Next time she starts licking her digits, pass her a napkin and mention that she is likely ingesting some nasty germs along with her sauce and might catch an infectious disease. You could also reveal in passing that finger licking is considered the height of bad manners in Korea and Japan, and (come to think of it) here at home as well.

In a rant on the Web against the adverts of a certain multinational chicken franchise, Wendy Cheng, a sassy little blogger out of Singapore, dubbed finger licking a “sexual act.” She declared it “too gross for words … due to the phallic shape of the finger.”

Now, I don’t mean to put Cheng forward as an authority on etiquette but I thought you might find some use for this little anecdote in your attempts to establish finger licking as an undesirable practice in your pal’s eyes.

Please send your most vexing social, ethical and etiquette- related dilemmas to weekendpost@ nationalpost. com.