The skinny on the skinny
Every Wednesday, our panel of Tyramaniacs sasses the lasses on America’s Next Top Model. Send your cattiest comments about the show to topmodel@ nationalpost. com
One episode down, one magic moment already.
On last week’s opener viewers got a taste of what America’s Next Top Model’s producers are willing to do to fend off the competition ( Hey, Martha, this means you.)
Right after their first runway show, the contestants were driven back to their Beverly Hills mansion in a stretch limo. Hormones were high, when Kim, the boyishly cute “ full- blown lesbian” planted a wet one on curious Sarah’s bee-stung lips.
“ You might think it sounds a little Girls Gone Wild,” panellist Craig Courtice
says. “But it was less sorority and more a genuine gesture between two girls away from their hometowns for the first time.”
Yeah, whatever. But the episode accomplished its mission. Top Model drew 4.7 million viewers, a 57% increase over last year’s premiere.
“ This year might actually be a competition,” says Aaron Wherry. “Tyra and the producers seem a little more intent on reminding everyone why the show theoretically exists in the first place. Which is nice. Boring. But nice.”
And so Outprance, Outpout, Outpose presents our full-colour, graphic analysis of the 13 longlegged dreamers, vying to become the next top model to be forgotten by next season. The last word goes to our fearless panel leader Siri Agrell.
“I think this season will be about whipping the girls into shape, while they sabotage themselves with bad walks, awkward poses and listless expressions. “Oh, and the lesbian will try and make out with everyone.”
America’s Next Top Model airs at 8 p.m. ET on CHUM stations.