Help B.O.B. raise $1M to prove Earth is flat
Let’s clarify one thing: the Earth is not flat. It has never been and will never be flat. It is as round as a basketball or Timbit or a lolly pop or a beach ball — all delightful things.
But just because this is a fact doesn’t mean everyone agrees with it. Take, for example, rapper B. O. B., who was once best known for his music, with Grammy nominations and chart- toppers to his name. Until, that is, he decided to dabble in one of the dark arts — science.
Specifically, B.O.B. is a notorious flat- Earther, one so passionate he once released a “diss track” called Flatline, sharing his views while also blasting astrophysicist Neil DeGrasse Tyson, and is now even a dedicated member of The Flat Earth Society.
Now, one might say, “stay in your lane, B. O. B., real name Bobby Ray Simmons, Jr.” But due to pure ignorance, freedom of speech and etc., etc., it may be best to just humour the rapper, who is willing to prove his beliefs — with your help.
B.O. B., who is now going by the alter ego “Flat Earth Bob,” has set up a GoFundMe page asking fans to contribute whatever they can so that he may be able to buy a satellite or rocket or whatever machine can fly into space and bring him back some firsthand photographs of this totally flat planet.
Far be it from B. O. B. to, you know, just google some images, which any average Joe could have tampered with, or, say, road-trip to the edge and Instagram Live us from there (according to the Flat Earth Society, NASA “guards” are waiting at the edge, ensuring commoners don’t fall over, obviously).
In the page’s video plea, he says, “I’m starting this GoFundMe because I would like to send one, if not multiple satellites, as far into space as I can, or into orbit as I can, to find the curve. I’m looking for the curve.”
He i s hoping to reach US$ 1 million, and has so far raised $ 1,900 — $ 1,000 of which he donated himself because science is not a oneman mission.
Those who have already donated have shared their thoughts on the page’s wall, with one user putting it most succinctly: “He is both the hero we wanted and the hero we needed.”
Non- believers, however, continued to chime in, writing, “I’d chip in for you to take some science classes.” And “I’ ll donate $ 1,000 if you can tell me what that curved shadow is on a crescent moon?” Or “Why not just travel to the edge of the Earth? It would be a lot cheaper.”
Fortunately, Flat Earth Bob is neither dissuaded nor learned, and is continuing to pursue his $1-million goal to explore space and, frankly, more power to him.
Because what else does The Flat Earth Society need besides evidence?