Often, our highest expectations equal dismay

Treat yourself to a holiday that actually relaxes

We all look forward to summer, and the chance to unwind, relax, renew energy and enjoy long hours of daylight. But, despite high hopes, many people start September feeling stressed and anything but relaxed.

It is in fact those high expectations that create the disappointment so many of us feel after our holidays. In his book Stumbling on Happiness, Daniel Gilbert explains how notoriously inaccurate we are when we try to remember how past events made us feel and when we estimate which ones will make us happy. Comparing distorted memories and inaccurate expectations with reality is one reason why summer so often disappoints.

Another is that, in our eagerness — and for some, fear of boredom — we overplan our holidays. This is despite a survey carried out by lastminute.com that found nearly a third of Britons feel stressed when planning their summer holiday. Gabriela Tonietto and Selin Malkoc at Ohio State University compared the experience of participants who imagined taking part in carefully planned leisure activities with those who imagined something more spontaneous. Less planning was associated with greater enjoyment.

Rather than falling into any of the habits that will sabotage the pleasures of summer, here are some suggestions:

❚ Begin by simplifying holiday plans

Minimizing the travel involved is a great first step. A survey by Ford S-Max found nearly a third of respondents consider a staycation to be less stressful than travel abroad, and there are so many places in the UK to choose from.

❚ Don’t feel you have to book a long holiday to derive benefits

Jeroen Nawijn at the University of Rotterdam found holiday happiness is unrelated to length of stay. Instead, it’s what you do that counts. Nawijn found only those who rated their holiday as “very relaxing” enjoyed lasting benefits.

❚ Don’t overschedule

As suggested by Tonietto and Malkoc’s study, you’ ll enjoy the freedom that comes with spontaneity rather than following a strict plan.

❚ Don’t fear boredom

Psychologists have shown it is linked with increased creativity.

❚ Keep the best memories of your holiday intact

Enjoy the benefits of your summer for longer, knowing those lovely reminders are accurate by writing down the three most enjoyable moments of your day each evening.

❚ Most importantly

Start developing a mindful attitude so that by September it has become a habit. Rather than expecting things to turn out in a particular way, approach each day with a curious and open mind. After all, no moment will ever be like any other.

The Daily Telegraph