Scary house a better actor than the stars
Horror flick would like to be more clever than it is
THE INTRUDERS ★ ★ Starring: Miranda Cosgrove, Donal Logue Directed by: Adam Massey Running time: 92 minutes
If horror tends to be driven by our unconscious society-wide fears, then the Ontario-shot thriller The Intruders seems to be a reflection of the modern fear of buying a house without a home inspection.
In this market, what could be scarier than sinking a million into a lovely old Victorian only to learn it’s harbouring a horrible nightmare the old owners didn’t want to deal with?
There’s no knob and tube wiring in the house Rose (Miranda Cosgrove) and her father move into — some things are too terrifying to even contemplate — but it’s harbouring plenty of other spooky secrets.
The old owner apparently left in a hurry, leaving all her creepy old furniture, complete with hidden doll heads.
What’s more, she left not long after a young girl she had taken in disappeared under mysterious circumstances.
These and other horrors await when you fail to read beyond the real estate listings.
Suspicious activity doesn’t bother Rose’s architect dad (Donal Logue), but maybe only because he’s more concerned with her mental state.
She suffered a breakdown that knocked her out of college after the death of her mother and he’s hoping the change of scenery will do them good, not least because it’s always been a dream of his to remodel.
That the remodelling crew is staffed by a strapping young lad (Austin Butler) with eyes for Rose probably wasn’t part of the plan, but he seems to be helping her adjust all the same, at least when she can stomach all that creepy contractor plastic and the occasional unholy scraping noise. It’s just them replacing the eavestrough in the dead of winter, I swear!
The Intruders would like to be more clever than it is, but it’s hamstrung by a script that’s a bit of a fixer-upper, and the fact that Cosgrove, trying to grow up after TV’s iCarly, is at this point much more of an enunciator than an actor.
It would like to be a mystery playing off Rose’s damaged mental state — is there really something weird going on here or is she just light on her meds? — which it tells you by having her father constantly question her mental state and her meds.
Cosgrove portrays agitation mostly by talking faster (though quite clearly), and even her chemistry with Butler is mostly one-sided, found in his lusty smiles at her.
What director Adam Massey can’t find in his actors, though, he does at least drag out of his house.
There is far too much reliance on jump-scares and creepy dolls — the lifelike doll industry must be half supported by horror movies buying them so they can nail their dead-eyed heads to things — but he also captures a chilly grey-brown atmosphere in their surroundings.
The final twist is both ridiculous and obvious, but by the time it comes, it’s more of a relief, as it means things are almost done.