Be careful, especially on the beach

Q My friend is on vacation, staying at a beach hotel. She’s 38, and tends to get herself into situations that become major dramas.

She sent me a photo of herself sunbathing in her bikini. Next, she was telling me about a good-looking guy walking the beach. Minutes later, she messaged that they’d connected on Tinder.

When I heard from her a couple of hours later, she was frantic! The guy had been very flattering, asked her to go walking with him, took her hand then became very touchy-feely, she said. Then he started telling her how sexy she is. I know she loves this stuff, but sometimes she lets it go too far — and it did.

He said he was staying in a house off the beach and they should go there so they could have “crazy sex” together.

She bolted. At least that’s what she told me when she phoned me to talk — and cry and rant — as soon as she got back to her hotel room. She was so wound up that she didn’t make sense; she said she’d call the police and “charge him” … but with what? She said she’d move hotels because he knows where she’s staying. OK, maybe if she’s that scared or he got really angry with her, she’s right to have done that. Or is she overreacting, as usual? — Drama Queen’s Friend

You’re correct that she seeks excitement before she knows if she can handle it.

I’m aware of very successful dating relationships that started through Tinder, so it’s the person, not the app that opens the door to potential problems.

Lots of people meet on a beach. But even when wearing a bikini, there’s a dance of discretion that should take place.

Sure, she should move. Who knows what else she told him about herself that would cause him to pursue or bother her further? But when this blows over and you have a chance to talk to her in person, you can use this incident to discuss dialing down the chances for potential danger in future.