Thinking about mom
“My mom, in a retirement home? No way. Not her.”
It’s hard to picture your mom or dad as people, and not just parents. Parents are strong, seemingly immortal in our minds. Sure, they might need an extra hand now and then, but they love their home. Besides, even if you thought a change might be a good thing, they’d never go for it. Lose their freedom and independence? Leave their home? No way. Not them. And definitely not now.
We hear you. It’s hard to imagine a parent as vulnerable or lonely, or somehow lacking in care and support. You do your best to make their lives better. They get lots of love – that’s what family is for – and the last thing you want to do is impede their independence. But here’s the thing: a lifestyle change, whether it’s a move into a retirement community or any other form of care, is often the spark needed to rekindle their independence, not hamper it.
What is it that your mom or dad needs most to live well? Is there something getting in the way? What brings them the most joy? The biggest frustration? These are the things that matter most to them, and they’re your starting points when exploring options.
5 QUESTIONS FOR SENIOR LIVING
It’s helpful at all stages of life, but particularly in older age, to reflect on your health and ask yourself whether where you are living gives you the best opportunity to do what you want. For example:
Can you comfortably manage your daily personal and care needs?
Are there any areas of your life where you could use some help to live as independently as possible?
Are there any risks to your safety or well-being in your home?
Has your ability to make sound decisions about your own health and well-being changed?
Are you able to manage your own money?
There are no right or wrong answers here. These questions are just meant to get you to start thinking a bit more objectively about why a change might be good for your mom or dad. Perhaps soon, or maybe later, but definitely before it’s a necessity. Take your time here. Talk it out with your siblings, your friends. It’s time to have a Real Talk on senior living.
Revera created a Real Talk on Senior Living guide to make it easier for you to understand senior living options. And to tell it like it is. You can consult the entire Eguide at www.reveraliving.com
For more information on Revera’s Retirement Living Open House on April 30, visit www.reveraliving.com/retirement-living/open-house