HELEN MIRREN VAMPS IT UP
Winchester’s ghost has seven storeys ... and plenty of secrets, Chris Lackner writes.
MOVIES
Big release: Winchester (Feb. 2) Big picture: Helen Mirren plays Sarah Winchester, the loopy heiress to the Winchester family firearm fortune — and a woman devoted to perpetually building a “gigantic, seven-storey structure with no rhyme or reason” on a remote property 50 kilometres outside of San Francisco. At 500 rooms and counting, we’re told it’s the most “haunted house in the world.” We’re also told the story is “inspired by true events.” Really. Of course, the home has a double secret. It’s less a haunted house and more a haunted prison for vengeful, diabolical souls. Her niece (Sarah Snook) and a brilliant, handsome, no-nonsense doctor (Jason Clarke) get caught up in the spiritual crossfire. Unless the new Ghostbusters make a surprise showing before end of credits, this picture isn’t going to end pretty. Forecast: Mirren vamps it up in “the house that ghosts built.” What else are you going to do on a Friday night in February? (I can’t be the only one who would have preferred Groundhog Day 2).
TV
Big events: Altered Carbon (Feb. 2, Netflix); Coach Snoop (Feb. 2, Netflix) Big picture: The streaming service spends big money on this 10-episode adaptation of Richard K. Morgan’s sci-fi tale set in the distant 25th century. By then, the human mind will be digitalized and the wealthy among us will be immortal — body hopping like a game of human musical chairs. Joel Kinnaman (The Killing) stars as a tough guy freed after 500 years in storage to solve a murder — his permanent ticket out of a computerized prison (if he can solve the case). Expect exposition like, “Your body is not who you are. You shed it like a snake sheds its skin.” It’s like Total Recall meets Blade Runner meets Self/less.
Meanwhile, Coach Snoop follows sometime rapper and marijuana aficionado Snoop Dogg as he attempts to coach a youth football team. Yup. Seriously.
Forecast: Snoop will start a new trend. Prepare for future music-reality shows like Dentist Drake and Mime Miley Cyrus.
MUSIC
Big release: Justin Timberlake (Man of the Woods) Big picture: The man who brought sexy back has become a man of the woods. What does that mean? Next to nothing musically. But a lot of promo material involves woods, flowers, fields, horses, rivers, bonfires and flannel. Sure, Timberlake missed the hipster beard and boots movement, which peaked at least two years ago. But mainstream America need now worry. JT hasn’t become a hybrid Johnny Cash and Davy Crockett. His dance/ pop is still fool proof and irresistible. There is little country twang to be found. And his lyrics are still largely meaningless — when they’re not downright juvenile. Case in point, the debut single Filthy: “And what you gonna do with all that meat?” Uh, I dunno, Justin? But the man can still craft a danceable, addictive ditty. Forecast: You’ll buy this for the nostalgia factor alone so you can reminisce about a gentler time when a wardrobe malfunction — and not nuclear war or a White House that takes the name literally — was the worst thing our southern neighbours had to worry about.
To cap off your week of yesteryear reflections, JT makes his anticipated return to the Super Bowl halftime show on Sunday. (I predict a Janet Jackson surprise appearance).