WOMAN BELIEVES MOM IS PLAYING FAVOURITES

Dear Abby: I am on a limited income. My younger sister, “Tara,” is a medical professional with disposable income she spends on frivolous things. I have one son, age 13; she has three children, ages 14, 10 and three. Tara and I live a few miles apart; our mother lives 95 kilometres away. My mother keeps my sister's kids every other week. She rarely keeps my son. I must bring my son to her; she drives all the way to Tara's house to pick up her kids and take them home. I have “borrowed” a rather decent sum of money from my mother. She regularly asks me about paying it back. She spends a lot of extra money on food for Tara's kids because of their special dietary needs. Between that and all the driving back and forth, my mother has spent nearly twice as much catering to my sister as what I have borrowed in the same amount of time.

I feel this is very one-sided and that, for some reason, my mother cares more about Tara than about me. I also feel like my son is neglected by my mother. Should I say something or just leave it alone?

Lopsided in Georgia

Dear Lopsided: It appears you are jealous of your sister for many reasons. Your mother has the right to spend her time and money on whatever she pleases, as does your sister. I don't know why your mother favours Tara's children. Perhaps it's time to ask her why.

As to her request you repay the money she has lent you, I suggest you work out a repayment plan starting now in the hope that it will improve your relationship with her. But if that doesn't happen, arrange for someone else to watch your son.