Funny Stuff
RINGWORM ROUNDUP
The old John Deere AR tractor popped and banged in the pasture beyond the barn. A steer was in need of treatment before ringworm a iction caused him pain. He was a wild one, so my daring Ed devised an ingenious plan of catch and release. Family members were enlisted to ride beside him and herd the capricious beast. Once caught, the ornery steer would be anchored to the tractor, where treatment would commence. But first, he had to be roped, all agreed that there’d be too much roaming room to get the procedure done otherwise. Although there wasn’t full consensus, the animal had not been consulted and went berserk when he felt the snare of Ed’s lasso! And o he went, leading what turned into a wild pasture chase, with Ed bouncing along behind him like a kangaroo, trying to keep pace.
A fence post designed for relief of itchy bovines was coming up fast with the steer revving out at about ten mph and Ed, hanging on to the rope for dear life, doing a decent nine behind him. The post, Ed thought, would be the answer to his prayers—he’d double-wrap the rope around it, and halt the steer right there in its tracks. A foolproof solution he thought, until the rope was hitched and the “racing roper” came to the painful realization that the post was anchored, not in dirt but in mud, thanks to perpetual rain in recent days.
As he chortled to his brotherin-law, “I’ve got him now, Fred,” out popped the mud-sucking post and konked the mastermind on the head! Without rope or beast in hand, he lay there mired in mud and juicy cow pie. The tractor hitch snared the unsuspecting bovine as he raced by it. In due time, Ed recovered suciently to apply soothing oil (with excessive vigour) to the beast’s a icted areas. A week later, Ed had severe ringworm but the steer was doing fine.