Asperger’s in adults
FEEDBACK
Regarding the woman whose husband’s all-consuming “hobby” leaves her lonely (Sept. 18):
Reader — “Note the characteristics of her husband’s behaviour and attitude which she described.
“They include: intensity and focus (obsession) with a topic or activity; inflexibility about schedule and anger at disruption of routines; issues with socializing; spending “all their money” on the object of his focus.
“These are the hallmarks of Asperger Syndrome (AS).
“Sadly, this situation is very familiar to me in my marriage.
“Everyone talks about Asperger’s in kids, but there’s a dearth of resources for adults, and even less support for wives and husbands of these people.
“So many readers would benefit from learning about this.”
Ellie — Many thanks for highlighting the need for further understanding and resources for adults with Asperger’s.
Since 2013, people with these AS-like symptoms are now included within the autism spectrum disorder.
The symptoms vary greatly. But an interest in one or two narrow topics is common.
FEEDBACK On why women are attracted to the so-called “Dark Triad” of Bad Boys (Sept. 13):
Reader — “Good old science, I love it!
“I’ve always wondered why I was attracted to Bad Boys and felt that I was to blame. I am, but now I know it’s just unconsciously, from my hormones!
“I did notice, after I had children, that the men I was most attracted to, were the ones on the playground engaging with their child. My heart swooned when I heard them call their child “sweetheart.” (I kept my attractions secret — we were all married).”
FEEDBACK Regarding the woman who fell in love at first sight of a stranger, on vacation (Sept. 21):
Reader — “The trigger to her despair is the word “vacation.” For me, after six weeks of texts with someone I never met, when the text symbol wasn’t showing up, it triggered hours of crying.
“What helped me move on, was hypnosis. The hypnotist explained that the situation was all at the subconscious level and I needed to help myself get out of it by reaching to my subconscious.
“After one session, gradual improvement followed. I was free of tears in six months.
“It also opened a new artistic side in me - writing poetry, painting, and creating art during that time, all self-motivated.
“It opened my eyes to how we should have more control on our subconscious and be careful not to open it to others because we get hypnotized a lot in our life, directly, and indirectly.”
Ellie Tesher was born in Toronto and has been working as a journalist for 25 years. She studied sociology at the University of Toronto before landing her first job at Children’s Aid as a case worker with foster children.
Email ellie@thestar.ca.