Ten ways to stop your heart from turning to stone
Ten ways to keep your heart from turning to stone (and other things I learned this week).
This week I’m sharing my love and hope with you, if you need it, as sometimes both are in short supply. So what is mine, is now yours. All I ask is that you honour it, and share it with another soul in need.
We do not expose our hearts as freely as we could, we often walk through life searching for ways to hide from the eyes of others, the rejection, the judgement, or worse, indifference. So in those times, where our heart is most open, maybe forced by grief or opened through joy and change, it is then, that we risk our biggest hurts and invite our potential gains. Either way, an open heart is a vulnerable heart. I am glad there is a such a thing.
Someone I love deeply sent me a note this week. It was welcomed with an open heart. It too inspired me to laugh (maybe cry some too) and write this essay. So here goes…Ten ways to stop your heart from turning to stone ( and other things I learned this week).
#1 When you get more bad news – let it sit for a minute, smile and say ‘I always plan for the worst case scenario’ – while secretly wondering what really great news is like. Then, laugh a lot, it is more fun than the alternative. Cry too though, if you like, it’s okay to do that, if nothing else, you’ll know you can.
#2 Send a cute bitmoji to a friend. This one is self explanatory. It’s a fun, human thing to do. If you don’t know what this is, it’s time you found out. Google it and then make one. Your friends, kids or grandkids will think it’s funny at the very least. I’m pretty sure the sight of me (or you) as a watermelon is enough to brighten a day. Being silly is perfectly acceptable. Who knew…
#3 Let the warmth of children, fill your spirit. I stand in the hallway at work each day and wait until the long line of little ones pass by, all in a row on a daily daycare trek. I swear I’ve never seen so many people excited to see me ( and giggle)( and wave) and say hello back, as they toddle by. Children are hope, after all. Don’t forget.
#4 Read your horoscope, or at least find out what your ‘sign’ means. I guess I’m a Libra, I like balance, my best match is a Gemini and my lucky number is six. I’m apparently elegant and diplomatic. It made for a great conversation with a friend, and hearing their horoscope made me feel better about mine. It’s good to think of other things sometimes. Oh yes and knowing more about myself through the stars, this list of ten just dropped to six, as I’m indecisive and my ruling planet is Venus.
#5 Go to Ireland for a month and on return live in a yurt (by a creek with a big tub and a wood burning stove, of course). Seriously, remember life is an experiment of sorts and when all else fails, make a plan, as silly as it might be. A lack of certainty can be difficult to manage. If I think too hard about the future, or having all the answers, I feel lost. So, make as much certain as you can, and after that, it’s time to embrace the idea that there is not a answer until there is, an answer. Oh, if you have a better idea than Ireland and a yurt send it my way, I’m doubting you have a more interesting and practical solution.
I wasn’t kidding when I said six. This one is important and it’s worth four.
# 6 People are good, believe it. People can disappoint you, they often let you down, push you away, hurt your feelings, and make you wonder whether to believe in the good in others. Watch where you are looking, though. Do you see your ‘people’? If not look closer, they are all around you. They are the friend that takes you for an after work ‘old fashioned’ and laughs with you and a stranger when you walk in the wrong door at the airport, maybe the older man that talks to you for ten minutes in the line up at a coffee shop and tells you he’ll remember you as the happy girl with the bluest of eyes, while others just stand in line without a word. They too, are the late night text senders that lift your spirits just a bit when the message comes in.
It’s the simple bits of love shared that keep our heart alive and open. More than anything, it’s the kind smile, the warm embrace , the gentle look of honest compassion and the humorous appreciation that keep a heart from turning to stone. I’ve found that a warm open heart can’t break, it can just feel. I should know.